Legends of Orre
by Phoenix Espeon
Summary: Attempts to instate a League in Orre would never have gone well under the best of circumstances, but put together leaders consisting mainly of "unusual" teenagers, unimpressed Colosseum leaders, and a Cipher conspiracy, and watch everything go to pieces.
1. Carnival START

Gateon Port was normally a sunny, cheerful place, filled with the cries of Wingull and Chatot, the constant hum of activity clustered around the harbor, and happy tourist families taking pictures of the scenic view.

Normally.

The rumbling roar of a motorboat cut through the normal racket with surprising ease, its driver pushing it as fast as it would go. A second, nearly identical one followed at breakneck pace, preceded by various long-distance attacks fired by an Octillery wrapped securely to the boat. The driver of the first was hard-pressed to keep the attacks from collapsing his boat, and it was obvious.

"'It'll be easy', you said!" he shouted into the headset of his Pokégear. "'No one'll see you,' you said! In what _universe_ is 'no one' a trigger-happy lunatic with an Octillery for a machine gun?"

The voice answering him was muffled, presumably over distance or something like that, though the teenager could still hear it fine. "It's not _my_ fault you got _caught_ by a damn Houndoom," a girl's voice answered him crossly. "Shut the fuck up already and get back to hauling ass."

"Bitch and whine," he snarled, jerking his motorboat into a hard left in time to avoid a Flamethrower taking out his starboard side. "Fucking Octillery!"

"I didn't know you were into that kind of thing," the voice deadpanned.

"Shut up. Where _are_ you, anyway? You said you'd be here twenty minutes ago!"

"I _am_." He could hear the unspoken "_you retard"_ in her tone. "You're not looking in the right place."

As if she'd been waiting for the cue, the surface of the harbor suddenly split in two, as a massive, crimson-scaled Gyarados ascended. It rose from behind his pursuer's boat, blotting out the sun. He recognized the massive beast, and could easily guess the diminutive rider seated on its crown.

The girl's voice had an almost audible smirk. "Hoenn born and bred, remember?"

And with that, the sea serpent descended on the boat, roaring its battle cry.

* * *

"So, let me get this straight." Lance Pendragon, the effective leader of the Indigo Plateau and world-renowned dragon-type specialist, braced his elbows on his knees, leaned forward, and squinted at the two teenagers as if he could see their thoughts written on their faces. "_You_ come in from Altomare. Psycho dares you to sneak onto the Pyrite Colosseum leader's vacation suite, and you somehow think it's a good idea. And then you get chased through Gateon Port, stealing one of the motorboats to do so, and Psycho manages to get Godzilla to dive without being beached, then surface to essentially destroy the boat."

"Pretty much," Kris agreed. The much smaller girl seated next to him shrugged.

"Just checking." Lance rolled his eyes. "Did you really _have_ to annoy the colosseums? We're already having enough trouble getting them to so much as _think_ about the idea of gyms."

"Not our problem if they have no sense of humor," the girl, known to most as Psycho, murmured.

"It is," Lance snapped, leaning back in his plastic folding chair. "It's bad enough that out of the teenagers we could have chosen, we got psychoanalyzed rejects like yourselves – "

"Hey!" Kris interjected, putting a wounded look on his face.

" – but if you can't even prove that you can conduct yourselves in an adult manner, we'll have to revoke your rights as a gym leader," Lance informed him.

"What, and she gets off scot-free?" Kris grumbled. Psycho smiled brightly at him, except it was less meant to reassure and more meant to throw off-balance.

"No, she's being sued for property damage by the city _and_ Acacia Sakaki," Lance said dryly. "You're being sued for breaking and entering and disrupting the peace, which is more important when the one being sued is a gym leader."

"So there," Psycho muttered, playfully elbowing him in the ribs.

"This is no laughing matter, Miss Fel," Kanto's dragon master actually _snarled_. The girl flinched back, then turned to glare at him, dark brown meeting gold.

"Someone's PMSing," Kris stage whispered in an attempt to diffuse the tension. Naturally, it didn't work.

"Fuck off, Pendragon," Psycho spat, fists clenched at her sides. "I have a damned lawyer, you shitface." She shrugged the black mailbag she carried off one shoulder and swung it into her lap, nearly hitting Lance with it as it went by (to his credit, he didn't so much as twitch). She produced a Pokénav from an inside pocket, and hit the speed dial.

"Where'd you get a lawyer so fast, anyway?" Kris asked.

"It's all in the illegal sleight-of-hand," Psycho said sarcastically as the Pokénav dialed. She put it to her ear as it finished. "… Oh, come on, it's not like I call you _every_ time I need some help… Okay, okay, fine, yeah, I do… No, not _that_ much collateral damage. I mean, Godzilla's fat but he's not that clumsy… just some theft and motorbat crushing… no, no one died. No, not even a little. _Swear_, do I have to do the whole 'cross my heart and hope to die' thing? Okay… Right, so we're in Orre… me and Kris, that's who. _Anyway_, Gateon Port, broke into psycho Colosseum leader's vacation home and got caught – no, that was Kris, not me – and Godzilla _might_ have squashed a motorboat or two. And maybe threw up a giant wave and pissed off people… Yeah, that's _it_… Yeah, the league. Pendragon… Uh-huh. Got it." She held out her Pokénav and pressed what was presumably the speakerphone button. "You're on now."

A woman's voice filled the room, as Psycho had apparently set her Pokénav to max volume. "Hello, my name is May Rah – "

"What kind of alias is that?" Psycho muttered.

"I'm Miss Yukicia's lawyer and I'm speaking to Lance, aren't I?" Without waiting for a response, the woman dropped her rational tone and began screaming, prompting Kris and Lance to clap their hands to their ears. "YOU FUCKING DUMBASS, YOU'RE ONLY DOING THIS 'CAUSE YOU KNOW YOU'RE GONNA GET SUED 'CAUSE YOU'RE THE FUCKING SUPERVISOR OF THESE FUCKING DUMBASSES – "

"Why do people always lump me in with you?" Kris groused. Psycho ignored him.

"AND YOU, YOU LITTLE RETARD, I KNOW YOU'RE DOING THIS 'CAUSE CIPHER'S THREATENING YOU WITH THAT WHOLE SHIT WITH THE LUGIA A FEW YEARS BACK, YOU LITTLE WUSS, I OUGHTA FUCKING CASTRATE YOU RIGHT NOW IF THAT'S EVEN POSSIBLE, I BET YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE THE BALLS TO DO ANYTHING RIGHT, 'CAUSE YA KNOW, YOU'RE BARELY A MAN – "

"Championshipping!" Psycho sniggered, high-fiving Kris. It had been one of their favorite rumors to spread, mostly because it involved Lance Pendragon hooking up with the impulsive boy from Pallet Town and massively screwed up any dignity their supervisor might have had.

"Both of you shut the fuck up!" Lance snapped at the teenagers, his whole face and ears fire-engine red to match his hair. "And you, Leagionarre, get your damn ass out of my business!"

"FUCK OFF OR I'M GONNA GIVE YOU A BOOT TO THE HEAD," the woman roared back at him. "WHO THE FUCK IS BOTHERING TO SUE THESE DUMBASSES ANYWAY? THEY'RE FUCKING BROKE!"

"Not everyone does everything for the money, harpy," Lance growled. "One of them happens to be Acacia Sakaki."

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, WHAT KIND OF IDIOT ASSIGNS ONE OF SAKAKI'S RELATIVES TO A COLOSSEUM? I'M GONNA KILL ALL THOSE FUCKING TEAMS FOR PERSONAL REASONS, THOSE FUCKING MOTHERFUCKERS – "

Psycho coughed. "Hey, can we get back to the whole 'being sued' shtick and get back to the 'I must avenge my honor' thing later?"

"WHATEVER! JUST TELL PRETTY BOY TO DROP THE FUCKING CHARGES BEFORE I KILL HIM AND ALL THOSE CIPHS HE'S PAYING. GOT IT?"

A loud click filled the air as "May Rah" hung up without bothering to wait for a reply. Psycho raised her eyebrows at Lance. "You heard her. So, whatcha gonna do?"

Lance buried his face in his hands. "Just get the fuck out and don't let me hear about you for the next year or so," he responded, reply muffled.

Psycho smirked, victorious, got up, and managed to flounce out of the office. Kris stared after Psycho, then at Lance, and realized that Psycho had completely shown him up in terms of completely humiliating the dragon master and weaseling their way out of any legal penalties.

So he did the manly thing and punched Lance in the face before following her out.

* * *

A/N: Yes, I know using caps to denote someone screaming is bad technique. Yes, I know it's bad taste to drop the F-bomb so many times in one chapter (this is rated T or whatever for a reason, you know). Stuff like that. No, I don't care~

And yes, this fic involves a Cipher conspiracy. MORE DETAILS NEXT CHAPTER PROMISE. It just doesn't seem to make sense to discuss it some more with Lance still hanging around.

Also, this fic is also up on deviantart under the username SincerityDawn. Thought I should mention it.


	2. City of Fools

Piez Pastryton, fifteen-year-old leader of Gateon Port's gym, ran her fingers absently through Biscuit's thick purple mane. Only a few months ago, the sight of the Suicune would have sent Gateon into a frenzy, but the locals had gotten used to the legendary and his rider hanging around the streets by now, and the tourists simply assumed it was yet another tourist trap in a sea of millions. Besides, Piez doubted most of them realized it was an actual Suicune staring vacantly at the passing crowd, judging by the amount of cosplay sessions she'd been invited to.

She was in the process of blowing her sixth bubble out of supposedly blueberry-flavored gum when she spotted some familiar faces – namely, Psycho walking out of a building as Kris caught up. Neither of them looked particularly in a hurry, though Kris was grinning in a slightly delusional way. Piez nudged Biscuit in the side with her foot, prompting the legendary to get up and sulk through the crowd towards the two teens.

Kris noticed them first. "Hey, Piez!" he called, waving at the canine specialist. "I punched Lance's face in!"

"Shut up, Kris," Psycho told him. "_I_ could have punched his face in."

"No you couldn't," he argued. "You always let your wrists flop around too much."

"Who cares, I have Carvanha-skin gloves," Psycho pointed out. "You prat," she added under her breath.

Piez really couldn't tell if Kris was ignoring Psycho or just didn't hear her, so she decided not to give a damn. "So, are you guys gonna hafta pay for lawsuit stuff?" she asked.

"Nah, my lawyer bitched at Pendragon and he shut up," Psycho said cheerfully.

"Aw, I wish Biscuit would do that once in a while," Piez said. "The cosplayers here _never_ shut up."

"Should I pretend like I understand what you're saying?" Kris interjected. "Also, can we go now?"

"Why? Don't you like getting weird looks from everyone?" Piez asked.

"Nah, I think we got a tip-off about a conspiracy," Psycho said.

"Stop taking all the good lines already!" Kris complained.

"Shut up, Kris!" Piez and Psycho said in unison.

Kris threw his hands into the air in exasperation. "Fine, I'll shut up and sulk in the emo corner," he groused. "_God_."

Psycho rolled her eyes. "Anyway, can we just head back to your place so we can have some plotting?"

"Right. Gotcher bikes?"

In answer, Psycho took an Ultra Ball from her bag and tossed it with a flick of her wrist. A motorbike appeared in a flash of white light – an orange motorbike with a maniacal grin and a glowing gold aura the same shade as the irises of its pupil-less "eyes". It took Kris a little longer to unlock his hoverbike from a random post in front of the building, while Psycho adjusted the dark-visored helmet she'd produced from… somewhere. Piez wasn't exactly sure, and she didn't really care.

"You guys can both see the lighthouse from here, right?" she asked.

Kris nodded and Psycho didn't answer, so Piez decided to assume she did. "Let's race, then," the Gateon leader grinned, Biscuit pivoting and crouching slightly so that he was angled towards the lighthouse.

"Ready?" Psycho called over her Rotombike's maniacal giggles.

"GO!" Kris roared in response, kicking his motorbike into action.

* * *

"Wait, Cipher's still around? I thought what's-his-face pulverized them ages ago!" Piez complained, ignoring Kris's swears in the background while Molly attempted to drown him with her own saliva.

Psycho shrugged. "That's what my lawyer said. Well, not _directly_, y'know, but still."

"Isn't your lawyer the one that threatens people with various weapons?"

"Yup," Psycho said cheerfully.

"Just checking," Piez said. "So anyway, Lance is _paying_ Ciphers?"

"Uh-huh," Psycho said, stirring her cup of espresso absentmindedly. "Right, Kris?"

The Agate leader stomped over grumpily, face still dripping from the Houndoom's greeting. "I hate you," he informed Psycho, accepting a towel from Piez (it wasn't the first time Molly had done this, and, in her opinion, Kris should be happy that Jericho hadn't joined in too).

"It's not my fault you're a magnet for suck," Psycho grinned. "Anyway, tell Piez all about the Ciph conspiracy, kay?"

Kris glanced around dubiously. They were standing at the top floor of the lighthouse, separated from darkening sky and the city below them by a thick layer of glass and steel bones, which didn't really feel secure. "Sure, so long as we get it out of the way that everything's your fault now."

"Done," Psycho said without hesitation.

Piez held up her hands before Kris could go on. "Okay, just skip over the dialogue unless you can remember what they said exactly, got it? Psych already said that."

"Then what _do_ you want to know?" Kris asked.

Piez shrugged. "I dunno, Lance's reaction?"

"Oh, that. After whassherface mentioned the Ciphs, she hung up right away, and then Lance went 'screw you all just get out of here'. Is that what you mean?"

"Yeah, pretty much." Piez took a sip of her caramel frappuccino before continuing. "So basically he crumbled after Cipher got mentioned _and_ Psych's special lawyer hung up? Sounds like either he doesn't want you guys to know about Cipher, or he was emotionally traumatized."

"How about both?" Psycho volunteered.

"I guess it's possible," Piez admitted. "But yanno, I never thought Lance was that much of a wimp."

"He's a total pansy," Kris argued. "I punched him in the friggin' face and he didn't do anything about it. I still think the lawyer was being serious about Cipher."

"Yeah, but why would they bother to infiltrate the League? It's mostly funded by former trainers anyway, and they still have issues left over from that time what's-his-face broke the power grid in Sinnoh," Piez said.

"Don't look at me, I plot downfall, not figure out how other people are doing it," Psycho grumbled.

Kris shrugged. "Does it really matter? If Cipher's back, someone's gonna stomp him, and if I remember right, the leaders get to double as the police or some crap like that."

"Maybe we're all overreacting and Psych's lawyer meant that Lance hired some reformed Ciphers?" Piez suggested hopefully.

Kris and Psycho managed to give the same response in tandem, which basically boiled down to "Yeah, _right_."

"Pessimists," Piez yawned. "Hey, has Ri taken over Citadark yet?"

"…"

"…"

"Okay, let's just call Ri and make her check if Cipher's hanging around Citadark. Less work for us, anyway," Piez said. "And when we head over to Pyrite, we can look around, or make Raea do it."

"Oh god, don't remind me about the road trip," Psycho groaned. "I think I'd rather risk Achuza. Or hell, yanno, actually _fly_ on Masa," she said, referring to her Rotombike and Flygon in turn.

"Hey, I'm the one driving!" Kris said indignantly.

"That's why I'm worried, you twat," Psycho said cheerfully.

"Ungrateful brat," Kris grumbled. "You're getting a free ride in a frickin' Camaro."

"Like I even know what that means," Psycho rolled her eyes.

Kris threw his straw at Psycho, who dodged it with ease. Piez reached over and stole his hot chocolate as Psycho retaliated by throwing one of the couch pillows at him. It wasn't like it was the first time her friends had trashed her house (admittedly, it was the first time it had happened at the lighthouse), which probably said a lot. Not that Piez really minded, since it was so much more fun to watch the chaos.

* * *

They did not arrive in Pyrite until the next day, and the sun was quickly sinking behind the sheer canyon walls. Kris had cheerfully broken multiple speed limits while Psycho seemed somewhat green under the blue raccoon mask, though she hadn't thrown up yet, which Piez decided was a good sign. He slowed down as they entered city limits, though not by very much. Still, there were more cars hanging around, and the Camaro was new.

"So, which way are we going?" Kris asked.

Piez, having long since pried the map from Psycho's hands, directed him towards the edge of town, where a broad, sloping path to the canyon rim began. As they approached, Psycho recovered and snatched the map back. "Are we supposed to be making a right turn here?" Psycho demanded, squinting at the scrawled instructions on a hot pink Post-It attached to the map.

"Unless I fail at reading Raea's handwriting," Piez answered. "Why?"

"Because I could have sworn we passed the gym a while ago," Psycho answered.

"Who cares?" Kris called. "We can just blame it on Strae when we get back. Left or right?"

"Sure, don't believe the girl who got you out of being sued," Psycho grumbled, conveniently overlooking the fact it was she who had gotten Kris into being sued in the first place.

"Hey, is that Bunny?" Piez interrupted.

"…"

"…"

"Holy crap, it is," Kris finally said. "Come on, everyone out."

Psycho scrambled out right away, taking in a deep breath of Pyrite air before starting off towards Bunny. Piez followed shortly after releasing Jericho and Tokyo from their Pokéballs, who, for once, were _not_ being silly and simply padded silently beside their trainer. The Espeon and Umbreon's easy synchronization probably looked at least a little intimidating, which Piez decided was a good thing.

On the other hand, Bunny did not look intimidating at all. It was hard to look intimidating while wearing giant plastic pink butterfly wings and dancing with a pink and purple Gardevoir. Very hard.

"Hold up, wait a minute, put a little _love_ in it!" the brunette sang out (off-key), flinging out a braceleted arm and blowing a kiss, which was mirrored by her Gardevoir – except in Narcissus's case, the kiss was accompanied by a wave of psychic energy, slamming into the charging Manectric and knocking it backward into the air. A boy that didn't look much older than Bunny swore loudly, anger distorting the tattoos that swirled up the right side of his face.

"Ane, Crunch!" the boy called. The Manectric scrambled to its paws, claws clattering on the asphalt, and leapt towards Bunny and Narcissus, fury clearly visible in the lines of its face and eyes.

Bunny let go of the Gardevoir's hands, and he whirled once before disappearing and reappearing in a flash of gold light, down on one knee and grinning into the startled canine's face. Narcissus's blue eyes flashed silver, and the Hypnosis took effect, and the Gardevoir caught the sleeping Manectric easily. He cradled the thunder wolf's head in his hands, bringing their faces together, noses almost touching, ignoring his trainer's cheers and the tattooed boy's swears. Wisps of translucent white fog escaped through the Manectric's teeth, coalescing into a cloud. Narcissus's lips parted slightly, and the Gardevoir inhaled the Dream Eater, smiling blissfully.

"Getcher rape face on," Psycho muttered to Piez, who coughed into her hands to disguise her snickering. Tokyo and Jericho purred quietly in amusement, and Kris looked like he was trying to decide between shooting something and strangling himself.

Narcissus stood up, wiped something nonexistent off his mouth with the back of one hand, and Teleported back to his master's side, who promptly slung one arm around his shoulders in a hug. Their opponent swore one last time before recalling his fallen Manectric and stalking over, pausing for a moment only to slap a wad of bills into Bunny's hand, before continuing on to the congregation of people, Pokémon, and cars backed against the canyon walls.

"Hey, Bunny!" Psycho called as they approached. "Congrats on smashing his face in."

"Please tell me that Manectric was a girl," Kris groaned, hand over his eyes.

"Dunno," Bunny said cheerfully. "Narcy doesn't care, do you Narcy?"

In answer, Narcissus smiled slyly and licked his lips, which prompted Bunny to giggle and hug him tighter. "I just remembered why I hate you," Kris said, voice muffled by the fact he was still covering his face with one hand.

"You big baby," Bunny teased. "C'mon, let's go find Strae."

"You don't know where she is?" Piez asked.

"Sure I do. She's over there," Bunny pointed at the crowd. "Yanno, somewhere in one of those cars waiting for the race to start. I think it's the little one."

"Wait, Strae's one of the racers?" Kris asked.

"Uh-huh."

"… But she looks like she's _ten_," Kris argued.

"Drift racing, Kris," Piez reminded him. "I get the feeling no one gives a damn. Now come on and _move_."

* * *

A/N: -is promptly brick'd-

YEAH SORRY ABOUT THAT. KINDA. SORTA. OKAY, SO I DON'T REALLY CARE TOO MUCH– -shot-

God you people are so violent.


	3. Keys to the Conspiracy

"… That's her car?"

"Uh-huh."

"It's so… tacky," Kris managed.

"When did we agree Raea had any taste?" Bunny wondered out loud.

The aforementioned car was small, compact, and streamlined. It was mainly a glossy black with two thick gold-and-pink stripes that fizzled into a comet's tail painted on the sides, and large gold Chinese characters adorned the roof of the car. At least, that was what Piez could see of it as they approached – the few humans and even more Pokémon intermingling between the ranks made it hard to see very well.

"It's very Raea-ish though," Piez said.

"I think the next thing she said she was gonna do was customize the wheels or something," Bunny said cheerfully. "That, or superglue glowsticks everywhere."

"Her car needs work," Psycho said dismissively. "It's not nearly as interesting as some of the others. For _example_," she kicked the wheel of a car they were passing, ignoring the driver's string of angry swears. The car had been painted black, with a white skeleton of what appeared to be a Kabutops juxtaposed onto the frame. It even had scythes coming from the doors on each side, which Piez was careful to stay away from (Tokyo and Jericho, on the other hand, examined it eagerly, Jericho even going as far to leap on top of it and perform a little strut).

"Who cares about _interesting_, it's _tiny_," Kris pointed out. "Does it even have a trunk?"

"Only if you count the fact the back seats fold down," Bunny said, sidestepping a burly, bald man, shirtless despite the oncoming chill of the night desert. Narcissus didn't bother, smiling dreamily at the muscleman instead, who hastily backtracked.

"And she ragged on me about _my_ car," Kris muttered.

Out of seemingly nowhere, a Sableye leapt onto Bunny's head, jabbering away rapid strings of gibberish. Bunny reached up and attempted to pull it off her head without tangling its sharp claws in her hair. "Hi, Gimble!" she grinned, holding the Sableye by its armpits. The Sableye then bit her hand, forcing Bunny to drop her with a cry of pain. Narcissus promptly shoved Bunny to the side, planting himself between the Sableye and his trainer, Magical Leaves shimmering into existence at his hands as he did so.

"The hell?" Piez wondered aloud. Jericho and Tokyo stepped forward as one, glaring down the Sableye, who spat something incomprehensible at them, ignoring Narcissus completely.

"Isn't that Raea's crazy Sableye?" Psycho asked no one in particular, not bothering to go for her Pokéballs.

"Yes it is," Kris answered, looking completely baffled. "You'd think she'd train her Pokémon better."

"Gimble, it's not very nice to bite people," Bunny scolded the Sableye, apparently unaffected by the mental trauma of having a Sableye drop on her head and try to eat her. Narcissus slowly relaxed, the Magical Leaves falling to the ground and dissolving into colored powder. Gimble spat a coin at Bunny's feet and leapt away, landing on the roof of yet another indignant racer's car and watching the group with her gemstone eyes.

"In case it's not completely obvious, I think she wants us to follow her," Piez pointed out.

"Narcy, maybe you should go back in your Pokéball," Bunny suggested. The Gardevoir rolled his eyes and recalled himself, disappearing in a flash of white light.

The group hurried after Gimble, who stayed on the car roof only long enough to check that they were following before leaping to another, claws screeching across the metal. She led them to Raea's car, sitting serenely in the center of a prowling pack of three Mightyena, all of which were being glared down by a shiny Luxray, black-and-gold fur glinting under multicolored lights.

"Hey, Solaria," Kris greeted the Luxray cheerfully, reaching up to scratch her ears. Solaria purred at her former trainer, though she didn't take her eyes off the Mightyena. "I can't believe Raea convinced you to actually come out of your Pokéball."

The Luxray let out a quick _mrooow_ of agreement, butting Kris's hand playfully. The girls left him to reacquaint himself with Solaria, circling around the car to talk with the driver.

"Oh, hey, Gimble did find you guys," Astraea Athanasia, better known as Raea, greeted her friends. "So, how's Pyrite?"

"Dry," Psycho said bluntly. "What's with your car's stalkers?"

"Wait, what?" Raea turned in her seat to glance at them. "Oh, you mean the Mightyena. It's normal. See, the drift races usually involve beating the crap out of whoever's fastest so you can get past them. Also involves jumping the gun and stalking out a rival before the race actually begins. Tira, Argyris, and Wicked are doing that for me somewhere around here."

"Sounds lovely," Piez said. "So why'd you give us directions to here instead of your gym anyway?"

Raea shrugged. "Why not? I figured you'd drive into Pyrite around this time anyway. Besides, I never stay in the gym. Duel Square or here, usually."

"Real responsible," Psycho teased. "You got the e-mail, right?"

"Yeah, with all that Sakaki and Cipher crap," Raea said dismissively. "Give me two more days and I'll have conspiracy theories for you by the boatload."

ATTENTION, RACERS. THE RACE WILL BEGIN IN T-MINUS TWO MINUTES. WILL ALL BYSTANDERS PLEASE REMOVE THEMSELVES AND THEIR POKEMON FROM THE VICINITY.

Kris clapped his hands to his ears, wincing at the telepathic call. It wasn't _loud_ so much as… uncomfortable. Invasive, even. Solaria stiffened, eyes suddenly starting to glow gold.

"Oh, hey, they're starting," Bunny chirped cheerfully. "Come on, we gotta get out of the way."

"Why?" Kris asked warily.

"Just do it, you'll figure out why later," Bunny said, grabbing the older teen by the wrist and half-pulling, half-dragging him to the sidelines. Solaria didn't bother to say goodbye, instead turning and baring her fangs at the Mightyena, who were glaring at the Luxray with renewed intensity.

"See ya," Raea waved at the ragtag band as Bunny led them away, not bothering to question why they weren't just using Narcissus to Teleport away from the track. The young Pyrite leader slammed the door shut, then turned to the Slowking sitting in the shotgun seat, reaching across him for the seatbelt.

"_This is most undignified,"_ Horace grumbled, curling his tail protectively against his side as his trainer fumbled for the seatbelt.

"Shut up, Horace," Raea snapped at the Slowking. "You have no thumbs and I don't trust psychics with my car."

The Slowking rolled his eyes and said nothing as his trainer settled back into her own seat, having no trouble with her own seatbelt. It was something of a tradition for Horace to bicker with Raea over the seatbelt, though usually his trainer took it with much more grace. _"You're in a bad mood_," he noted.

"No shit, Sherlock."

"_Are you worried about meeting Acacia Sakaki tomorrow?"_

"Worried," Raea snorted. "No, I'm trying to decide the best way to hand that bitch her ass without getting into trouble with the law. She tried to sue Kris and Psycho, remember? And I owe Silver a favor."

"_Not everyone _wants_ their aunt to suffer,"_ Horace pointed out mildly.

"If I was him, I would," Raea retorted. "Now shut up and get those screens ready."

Horace sighed and closed his eyes. When he opened them again, the pupils and iris were fading to white, blending into his sclera.

**RACERS, ON YOUR MARK.**

Psycho fished a Pokéball out of her bag, popping it open as they ran. An Infernape with black limbs materialized, loping along easily. "AK-47, go find me some popcorn," she directed him. "Buttered, mind." With a nod, the Infernape leapt away, swinging from one barely protruding handhold to another, ascending the cliff face with astonishing grace.

**READY.**

"Ready, steady," Raea muttered under her breath, hands tightening on the steering wheel.

**SET.**

Psycho scrambled up the ladder set into the sheer rock face last, vaulting over the last few rungs with ease. She accepted a plastic bucket filled with popcorn from AK-47, who had returned in record time. No one questioned where the Infernape had gotten it.

**GO.**

"Go!" Raea sing-songed in time with the call, slamming down on the gas as she did so. Horace's light green Protect shields leapt up in record time, flashing white where various attacks hit in a barrage of color and sound (and, in some cases, unlucky Pokémon and other racers in her way).

As the racers' sped out from the starting position, the Pokémon left behind flew into a frenzy, launching attacks with abandon, all trying to destroy the others. Fire met ice met electricity, fists slammed into rock and steel, razor-sharp leaves and wind whirled everywhere in a dervish of blade. Chaos, in short. Even above and between the cars, the duels continued, the more fleet-footed Pokémon using the cars as tiny battlegrounds or springboards to duel in the air.

"Should we stop them?" Piez wondered out loud.

"_It looks like fun,"_ Jericho chirped. _"Can we help?"_

Bunny shook her head. "No interference from any of the spectators. Part of the race involves keeping the other Pokémon off your own car."

"Ten bucks Strae totals someone's car for the hell of it," Kris said.

"Done," Piez shook his hand.

"I can see why Raea likes racing," Psycho commented. "Popcorn?" she offered.

* * *

The Desert Ruin had once been catapulted into fame as one of Duking's "Pokéspots", one of the few places where wild Pokémon were abundant in Orre. That had changed, mostly due to the harsh sandstorms that now circled it constantly, and also because a large rock structure had risen, seemingly overnight, and swallowed up any semblance of friendliness the desert might have once had. The combined presence of the monotonous monolith and the unending sandstorms deterred most visitors, and those that did usually turned back once they saw there was nothing to see.

Not Starfire Shirane.

The brunette resisted the urge to lift her goggles and get a face full of sand, instead shoving her hands deeper into the pockets of her light jacket and trying to ignore the tiny, stinging grains of sand that hurled themselves with abandon at bare skin.

"Mushi, Ty, how ya doing?" she called out, though her voice was slightly muffled due to the sheer white scarf she wore, again, against the swirling sand.

In response, a rock thumped down beside her, nearly missing her foot. Starfire bit back a swear. "Very funny," she said, as the Swampert snickered and pried out another rock from the shattered spiderweb crack he'd put into the Ruin's wall only a few minutes prior.

Ty was not doing as well as Mushi, mostly due to the Typhlosion's lack of a Ground, Rock, or Steel type. He kept pausing to wipe the sand out of his eyes and down a can of Lemonade, though he worked just as doggedly, if slower, as the Swampert, with rhythmic punches of his forepaws to force the rocks to fall away from the two Pokémon.

Starfire checked the time on her Pokénav. They'd been there for nearly two hours, working at knocking a hole into the rock wall, and the sun must have been setting by now. To be honest, Starfire hadn't expected it to take so long, but the rock was tougher and thicker than she'd expected it to be.

"Maybe we should call it a night soon," Starfire suggested. "Come back tomorrow, next week?"

In answer, the two Pokémon stepped back, then Mushi charged at the wall, throwing himself at it, right shoulder slamming into the wall.

"Guess that's a no," Starfire muttered as Mushi stepped back, allowing Ty to crouch on all fours and throw himself forward, fire wreathing his paws.

After another couple of solid hits, the wall gave way with a last creak of protest, rubble falling to the ground. It wasn't a very big hole, and Starfire could see she'd have to stoop to get through. Still, it was an amazing feat – from here, the wall seemed to be at least a yard of solid rock.

Starfire shook her head in amusement. "Okay, the two of you get ice cream when we get back to civilization." Mushi bowed mockingly as Ty recalled himself, disappearing into his Pokéball with a flash of white light. Starfire climbed carefully onto the hole in the wall, making sure not to bang her head against the old stone, Mushi lazily slouching back to rest on his knuckles to stand guard at the entrance.

It was pitch-dark inside the rock, which wasn't really surprising. Starfire, prepared for this eventuality, pulled a flashlight from the backpack slung over her shoulders, flicking it on and panning the cone of white light around her. The rock rose steeply, pointed ceiling jutting high into the air. As she'd expected, the monolith was an immense, hollow chamber. She half-expected to see a horde of Zubat come charging at the source of the light, but then, the chamber was sealed by the stone shell. Nothing could live here.

Reaching for her Pokéballs, Starfire plucked Shiala's from the Velcro straps that affixed it to her backpack. With another flash of white light, the Glaceon materialized, blinking sleepily. "Glaaaaaaaa?" she yawned. The translator thing-or-other Psycho had mailed to all the Orre leaders as a gift fizzled in Starfire's ear before supplying monotonously, _"Oh, is it dinner already?"_

Starfire slapped her right ear lightly, causing the translator to jump a little. Apparently sandstorms were bad for it or something. Didn't matter. "Nah, maybe later. Mushi and Ty did what they do best and broke the Desert Ruin, so now we're looking around."

"_Who wrote on the rocks?"_ Shiala asked.

"What?" Starfire swept the flashlight around, catching the Glaceon full in the face with it.

"_My retinas!_" Shiala howled in agony, though Starfire wasn't sure how much of it was real and how much she was faking.

"Sorry!" Hastily, the brunette pointed the flashlight away from the Glaceon.

The Glaceon rubbed at her eyes with one small forepaw. "Anyway_, look at the walls,"_ she directed.

Starfire obliged. Her flashlight illuminated etchings in the wall, angular lines of varying lengths that didn't resemble any script she knew. Luckily, it only covered a slim section of wall that was just inches away from being obliterated by the hole Mushi and Ty had created.

"Convenient," Starfire said.

"_Especially if you knew what it said?_" Shiala suggested perkily.

"That too," Starfire said. "Did I bring my camera?" she asked vaguely, rooting around in her backpack, which was more difficult than it sounded, considering she was still holding the flashlight in one hand.

"_Pumpernickel!_" Shiala shouted randomly.

"Found it!" the brunette exclaimed, triumphant, and promptly dropped the flashlight. With a sigh, Starfire managed to juggle around her things until the backpack was resting safely against her feet, the flashlight perched atop it, with the camera in her hands. She managed to snap five shots in quick succession with the flash feature, encompassing all the carvings in the wall.

"_Are you done now?_" Shiala asked, boredly cleaning behind a large ear.

"Probably," Starfire answered, dropping the camera back into her bag after rescuing her flashlight from nearly toppling onto the ground again.

"_Good, because I think you wanna go nose around there now_," the Glaceon said, indicating a vague area to her right. Starfire flicked the flashlight over, which semi-illuminated a gaping passageway that led presumably down underneath the sand.

"Ooh, good idea," Starfire said enthusiastically. "Come on!"

Shiala huffily shook some sand out of her paws before following her trainer into the tunnel. It descended gently, curving constantly counterclockwise, probably spiraling down.

They came to an abrupt halt, into a chamber as large as (if not larger than) the one they had left, though the ceiling was considerably lower. The flashlight danced across the uneven ground.

"Hmm. That's interesting," Starfire murmured.

A pile of boulders sloppily fixed to each other (for the most part) sat in the center of the room. A pattern of seven unlit dots arranged in the shape of an H winked back at Eclo Canyon's leader.

Regirock.

* * *

A/N: Is it really obvious I decided halfway through the chapter to just go "screw it" and throw in translations for the Pokémon because I'm lazy? |D -brick'd-


	4. The Vanishing Act

"_Look, I'm telling you there's no way that's Regirock_," Shiala argued, determinedly ignoring the boulders behind her.

"It's mostly the right color, it's the right pattern, it's the right place – well, kind of – why _wouldn't_ it be?" Starfire shot back.

"_It's not moving and you're not that lucky_," Shiala said bluntly.

"… Maybe it's sleeping," Starfire suggested hopefully. "Maybe we can get Frost to check if it's the real Regirock? I mean, legendaries should know each other, right?"

Shiala eyed her trainer critically. "_Frost's too stupid_."

"… Okay, maybe." Starfire allowed. "And she's too young. Probably doesn't know any of the legendaries anyway. But what _else_ are we supposed to do?"

Shiala rolled her eyes. "_Look, do you have any spare Pokéballs_?"

"… No," Starfire admitted.

"_Then come back tomorrow with some and see if you can catch it,_" Shiala suggested perkily. "_Yanno, if you wanna risk life and limb if it does turn out to be Regirock. Me, I'm not sticking my neck out against a Rock-type legendary, but I bet Mushi and Night would have fun, suicidal fox that she is._"

"I'll keep that in mind," Starfire agreed. "And speaking of Mushi, let's get out before he starts trying to knock another hole in the ruin out of boredom."

"_Oh, you don't have to worry about that_," Shiala said mock-seriously. "_He'll just set up an elaborate ambush to hit you with when you come out instead_."

"Why do I even bother?" Starfire asked herself.

* * *

Realgam Tower was originally built as one of Cipher's pet projects, but, as the first collapse of Cipher had come shortly after the Tower's completion, it was promptly seized by the combined authority of the Colosseum leaders. None of this had stopped the cluster of smaller hotels around its base to expand, turning into a miniature village of trainers, gamblers, and whoever they happened to have with them.

Daisy placed her hands on her hips and squinted up at the tower, steel, chrome, and glass reflecting the harsh Orre sun. She ignored the stares and glares that resulted from standing dead-center of the main entrance with her Persian by her side. The fake cat ears and tail Daisy was wearing probably didn't help much.

"This is definitely Realgam Tower," Daisy informed Kal, who didn't bother to grace her comment with a reply.

"Nice Persian you got there," a voice commented blithely. Daisy glanced away from the tower to meet the crimson eyes of a stout teenager not much taller than she was, with spiked hair and a dark tan. His slight slouch did nothing to detract from his aura of arrogance, and Daisy resisted the urge to loathe him on sight (though, judging by Kal's sudden cold gaze, the Persian didn't).

"Thank you," Daisy said politely, ignoring Kal's disapproving yowl ("_Stupid man-thing!_")

He smiled easily, which was a point in his favor. "I'm Ray Ellington. You staying here long?"

Daisy wondered vaguely if he was being friendly or trying to hit on her, how old he was, and why the name sounded familiar. She brushed all these aside. "You could say that," she agreed.

"Cool. Drop by the Colosseum some time, then," Ray invited. He walked past, disappearing into the crowd.

"Ah, that's who," Daisy muttered to herself. If she remembered correctly, Ray Ellington was the name of the Realgam Colosseum leader, who also held a large part of the gambling rings.

Daisy shrugged it off. It was none of her business, yet. Moon's gym might have been placed in Realgam, but it was still solidly on the ground rather than in the colosseum in the uppermost floor (this had disappointed Moon, who had complained for _weeks_ after learning where she was posted). Eventually, Ray Ellington would figure out she was a gym trainer, and then gone would be his interest (she hoped).

"Come on, Kal," Daisy sighed, sliding her sunglasses up over her forehead. "Let's go find Moon."

* * *

The sheer heat of Orre's desert was, Starfire decided for the ninth time, incredibly inconvenient. Still, even if it had taken the better part of the afternoon for it to cool down enough to travel through the desert, they were at the Desert Ruin now and that was good enough for her.

Starfire clambered through the hole Mushi and Ty had knocked into the wall the night before. This time, there was a dim light from the afternoon sun, though Starfire knew she couldn't count on it to last very long. A flash of red light illuminated the rock chamber and Night materialized, the Flareon stretching as she did.

"'_Allo, Star,_" Night greeted her trainer cheerfully. "_So, where's this Regirock you mentioned_?"

"Down thataway," Starfire answered, gesturing towards the passage.

"_This should be good_," Night purred. "_Apologies in advance if I can't dent it, but I don't think that's likely to happen._"

Starfire petted the Flareon affectionately. "Let's just hope it's actually Regirock and not a statue like Shiala said."

"_One more thing though,_" Night began. "_What happened here?_"

"You mean the damage Mushi and Ty did?" Starfire asked.

"_No, I can gather that. I mean, what _happened_ here?_"

Starfire looked around, taking a closer look this time. The previously undisturbed chamber was riddled with footprints in the sand, which couldn't possibly be hers and Shiala's. Various paw prints and clean-swept areas Starfire guessed were the trails of serpentine Pokémon were dusted in between and overlapping each other. There couldn't have been more than twelve sets of footprints total, but still, that was at least twelve people who had known of the Ruin and come to it – in the middle of the _day_.

"What the hell?" Starfire wondered out loud.

"_I concur_," Night said.

Starfire scowled, walking forward. "Come on, Night. I can think of only one reason someone'd come here." The Flareon bounded forward and overtook her trainer, not bothering to ask what it was – Regirock, of course.

When they reached the bottom of the stairs, Night stopped cold. Starfire nearly tripped over her but managed to catch herself and braced her hands on her knees, trying to catch her breath and look around simultaneously.

There was no trace of Regirock.

And more than that, the chamber bore obvious signs of battle. Holes dotted the muddy ground, presumably from a Pokémon's Dig and water attacks. The rocks bore deep marks and long scratches, the marks of claws and teeth. Here and there, a few subtle splashes of blood, still drying, though there were no corpses or mangled limbs to be seen.

"I guess that was the real Regirock after all," Starfire said, voice echoing strangely in the empty room.

* * *

Moon was jolted awake by her head slamming backwards into a metal wall, which was, naturally, _not_ good. She bit back a curse and felt the back of her head. Bump, but no blood. That done, she took a second to look around.

She was in some kind of metal box, which, judging by the constant rumble of an engine nearby, was the back of a truck. An old air conditioner squatted in front of the only air vent, competing fiercely with the wheels to see who could be louder. The box was empty except for another teenager and the apparently dozing Gallade crouched beside him – at least, Moon assumed that the teenager was a he, considering he was dressed in a very baggy hoodie and jeans, although his face was definitely girly and his straight hair brushed his shoulders.

He eyed her vacantly with unsettlingly light gray eyes, completely at odds with his feathery dark hair and sun kissed complexion. "Hello," he said, vaguely politely, but mostly seeming like he was ignoring her in favor of staring at something behind her head.

"Who the hell are you?" Moon demanded grumpily, mostly because her hands were cuffed behind her, as well as her feet, and she was in the back of a metal truck she couldn't remember getting in.

He didn't seem very offended by her rudeness (well, he didn't seem very… _anything_, but still). "My name is Riley de Muerta. This is Gabriel," he added, obviously meaning the Gallade next to him, who opened one red eye to scrutinize Moon.

"That's nice. Why am I in a truck?" she asked plaintively.

A shrug. "My orders were to prevent Moonish J from reaching the Realgam Tower. You see, my superiors find you inconvenient."

Moon blinked, attempting to connect his words and complete indifference despite the throbbing in her skull. She finally managed, "So you kidnapped me and you don't know why."

"Believe what you will," he said, pulling up his hood. Gabriel, unlike his trainer, opened both eyes, staring down the Realgam leader, who scowled back. "This is an incredibly inefficient vehicle. We will probably be at base in another two hours. I would advise against escape attempts." Riley produced a string of five minimized Pokéballs from a pocket, which Moon recognized instantly – _her_ Pokéballs, all veined with a strange dark purple-red material that gathered at the catch, obviously preventing them from opening.

"So you see, this is checkmate for you," he explained off-handedly, returning them to his pocket.

* * *

Now, no one could accuse Starfire of being a geek (well, very well, anyway), but she _had_ done some Google-style "research" on the Hoenn legendaries – more specifically, Regirock – before heading to the Desert Ruin for the second time. What she found interesting was that Regirock was never, ever, _ever_ mentioned without Registeel and Regice coming into play, and Regigigas wasn't exactly uncommon. All the myths involving them usually had the three lesser Regis working in tandem, more often than not aiding Regigigas, as if they were simply extensions of the titan's will. The myths also usually concluded with some variation of the phrase, "and then they were sealed away" in various tombs, the location of which varied with the region – but Registeel was always in the mountains, Regice by some form of ice (if impossible, water), and Regirock within the desert.

All of which was very interesting but did not help one bit.

Still, the Internet hadn't failed her completely. She had found the name and approximate location of one Jackson Kaminko, who lived in Orre, researching various legendaries and the myths surrounding them (after, admittedly, a stint inventing various pointless inventions). As Starfire figured no one would bother searching out the Random Gym within the walls of Eclo Canyon, the sudden disappearance of Regirock called for abandoning her duties as a Gym leader to investigate, and by "investigate", she meant, "nag some old cranky geezer until he says something useful", which was not very nice of her, but she didn't mind too much.

Dr. Kaminko lived on the other end of the desert, a journey that took the better part of a night and most of her flashlight's batteries. Starfire cursed her inability to drive or find a bus that would cross the desert as Kuroi wove his way through the forest, grumpily stepping over and around various species of increasingly dead-looking plants.

She dismounted the lightning lion, the thump of her feet muffled by the thick layer of dead plants. "Thanks, Kuroi," Starfire told the Luxray, scratching him behind the ears. "You can go back in your Pokéball now."

Kuroi closed his eyes as she recalled him, probably intending to go straight back to sleep. The Luxray hated serving as Starfire's method of transporation, but Frost couldn't exactly fly through a forest like this one – and Starfire didn't think it was a good idea to show up at a Pokémon legendary and mythology researcher riding an Articuno anyway.

The brunette checked her watch. She and Frost found the dark forest shortly after dawn, at which point Starfire had insisted on a nap and switched from the ice bird to Kuroi. Though the trees blocked out the light, she was fairly sure it was now a little after noon, which was a perfectly good time to nag the good doctor.

After a short session of stomping and shoving the local plants out of her way, Starfire managed to extricate from the maze of roots that might have been a path, to be promptly greeted by the sight of a tall, Victorian/Gothic/something-or-other mansion and a short, fat man with a lab coat and ridiculously curly hairstyle charging at her.

"What the – "

"You!" the little man howled, interrupting her mid-sentence. "You must be the burglar who stole the yoyo!"

Starfire blinked. "I repeat: what the hell?"

He ignored her confusion, continuing to screech at the top of his lungs, "For Dr. Kaminko's sake, Chobin must battle once again and defeat you to regain the yoyo!" The fat man – Chobin, apparently – brandished two Pokéballs threateningly at her before throwing them, releasing a Sunflora and a Gyarados. Starfire blinked, then decided she must have just been challenged to a battle. Shrugging, she selected two of her Pokéballs and, with a flourish, unleashed Night and Shiala from them in a flash of light.

"_Who is that diminuitive fat man_?" Night wondered.

"_Who cares_?" Shiala responded gleefully, quite ready for a battle after long hours of being cooped up in her Pokéball.

"Sun-Sun, Sunny Day! Maggie, Thrash!" Chobin caterwauled.

"Night, Quick Attack and Fire Fang the Sunflora! Shiala, back her up however you want," Starfire snapped out in response.

The Sunflora was the first to respond, setting up the Sunny Day just as Night crossed the distance between them with her Quick Attack. The Flareon snarled, all semblance of civility gone and jaws bubbling over with bright fire intensified by the heat of the unnaturally bright sun. She touched down lightly before pushing off again, aiming straight for the Sunflora's large, golden-petaled head.

The Gyarados attempted to intervene, but it was slow and ungainly on land, which Shiala took full advantage of by darting in front of it and blasting it with a point-blank Icy Wind, which, while not very powerful, was more than enough to stop it in its tracks. It retaliated by lashing out with the Thrash Chobin had ordered, sending Shiala flying into the air. She recovered mid-fall, twisting and executing a half-flip to touch down gracefully on her paws.

Meanwhile, Night sank her teeth into the Sunflora's head, the flames of the Fire Fang spreading quickly as it cried out in pain, flailing comically as it attempted to rid itself of the Flareon clinging to it. "Sun-Sun, Solarbeam and Razor Leaf!" Chobin screeched, noticing his Sunflora's predicament. The Sunflora obeyed, petals lighting up with golden-white light in quick succession, before it opened its mouth and blasted the Flareon away with a supercharged Solarbeam. Before Night could react – or even land – the Sunflora had unleashed a barrage of leaves that sped through the air with deadly accuracy. Night managed to somehow twist in midair and fire off a Flamethrower without being told, incinerating the razor-sharp leaves to harmless ash and land relatively unhurt, though her pride was obviously not as intact.

"_Why, you overgrown weed,_" Night snarled maliciously, running her tongue quickly over her lips. "_You're gonna pay for that._"

"Night, charge with Flamethrower and then use Fire Fang! Shiala, Ice Beam that Gyarados!"

"Sun-Sun, Solarbeam again! Maggie, Twister!"

Again, the Sunflora reacted first, the Sunny Day speeding up its reaction manifold due to its Chlorophyll ability. It fired a second Solarbeam at the charging Flareon, who met it with a stream of continuous fire. Sun and flame fought for equal ground, and Night advanced before leaping into the air above the Solarbeam and leaping back down, paws extended with the obvious intention of pinning the Sunflora, fire gathering at her teeth once more. She rammed into it, managing to knock it over and land directly on the leaves that served it for arms, before sinking her teeth into its oversized head again. This time, the effect was instantaneous, and the Sunflora cried out in pain before collapsing, resulting in Chobin's quick recall. Dimly, Starfire noticed the sun was fading away, its summoner bested.

Meanwhile, Shiala opened her mouth wide, and a crystalline beam spiraled from her maw, striking the Gyarados square in the face with winter's essence. Roaring in pain – although the Gyarados was a Water/Flying-type and therefore canceled out any type advantages, Shiala's abilities were not to be underestimated – the Gyarados beat the ground with its tail once, twice, three times, winds funneling around Shiala in a vicious twister, dragging the small, light fox into the air, tossing her about the constricted space in every which way.

"Icy Wind, Shiala!" Starfire ordered. "Night, use Night Slash!"

"Dragon Rage!" Chobin countered.

Night pivoted on her paws, turning and leaping straight towards the Gyarados, whose eyes were beginning to burn a fierce, bloody red. As she approached, the Gyarados threw back its head and roared its fury to the heavens, draconic fire lancing out from it in every direction. Night dodged first one, then a second missile successfully, before being grazed by a third and hit full on by a fourth. Shiala's cocoon of wind, quickly filling with her own northerly gale, deflected the brunt of the attack.

Successfully made even angrier, Night darted forward in a flash of reddish-orange-and-black fur, slashing into the Gyarados's scaly hide with manifestations of dark energy in the shape of claws. As she did so, Shiala broke free of the Twister, landing on her paws as she unleashed a Blizzard, enveloping both her teammate and the sea serpent in ice and biting winds, turning them into mere silhouettes within the snow.

When it cleared away, the Gyarados had collapsed on the ground, and Night leapt down daintily from the base of its neck. Her makeshift shield, combined with her resistance to Shiala's ice attacks and spectacular special defense, had kept her in more or less good condition. The same could not be said of the Gyarados, who was obviously unable to continue battling and was recalled by its trainer.

Starfire glanced at Chobin, smiling brightly. "Got anything better?" she asked sweetly. He scowled and was about to speak before an old man's voice interrupted them.

"Chobin, what on earth are you making all this racket for?" A man in a lab coat with a shock of white hair and an equally white mustache marched out of the doors of the mansion, bushy eyebrows pulled into a scowl. He matched the picture Starfire had found online of Dr. Kaminko, and, judging by Chobin's reaction, was definitely the right person.

"She's a burglar!" Chobin whined, jabbing a pudgy finger in Starfire's direction. "I was just going to beat her and make her tell me where the yoyo was!"

Starfire shrugged. "Didn't work and I don't know anything about a yoyo," she announced primly as Night and Shiala eyed the two men warily.

"For heaven's sake, Chobin, I have the yoyo here," Dr. Kaminko said irritably, producing what appeared to be a yoyo made of metal. Something gold was engraved onto the silver surface, though Starfire couldn't tell what from this distance. "Astraea left it in the basement."

Chobin spluttered indignantly for a few more minutes, which Dr. Kaminko tuned out, walking briskly towards Starfire. Night and Shiala exchanged wary glances, then stepped aside to let him pass before turning and flanking him.

"Now, miss, you'll do very well to tell me who you are and what you're doing in my laboratory," Dr. Kaminko announced, a little too loudly.

Starfire stuck out her hand impulsively, and Dr. Kaminko shook it. "My name's Starfire Shirane – " she began, only to be interrupted again.

"Starfire Shirane? You're sure now?"

Starfire eyed him strangely. "Of course I'm sure what my name is."

"Yes, yes," he waved away the mild criticism. "In any case, I have a message for you. Come inside, and Chobin will prepare some tea while we discuss. It would be quite rude to turn away a friend of my great-niece's." Turning swiftly, he marched away as quickly as he had come.

Starfire blinked once in confusion. "Uhm…"

"_What are you waiting for?_" Shiala asked. "_Follow him!_"

So Starfire did.

She caught up to him as he opened the front door, stepping aside to allow her inside first. Instead, Starfire paused and said, "Excuse me, sir, but how do you know my name?"

"My great-niece claims you are friends and wants you to come to her town or something of that sort," Dr. Kaminko said offhandedly as Chobin waddled furiously by, huffing and puffing his way to the kitchen. "Cricket! Tytonidae!" he called sharply.

The rustle of feathered wings answered his call, and a Pidgeotto and a Noctowl swooped down from above, the Noctowl perching itself carefully on Dr. Kaminko's shoulder, while the Pidgeotto hovered, wings flapping softly and rhythmically. A letter was clutched in its talons, which Dr. Kaminko exchanged with the yo-yo. The Pidgeotto cooed once before taking off, spiraling high into the sky to the south.

Dr. Kaminko handed Starfire the letter. "This is from my great-niece," he told her matter-of-factly. "Come inside and read it."

Starfire did as he said, although the inside of the mansion was just as depressing as the outside, which didn't seem to bother Night and Shiala very much. She seated herself carefully on an old, dark red couch as Dr. Kaminko settled himself in an equally ancient armchair, the Noctowl taking up a perch on a weather-beaten bust, and began to read.

_Dear Uncle Kam_, the letter began.

_Sorry to interrupt your research (let me guess, the link between Jirachi and Celebi?) but I needed to get in touch with you __right now__ (you need to check your email more than twice a week, seriously). Also, Cricket was getting fat. You can tell her I said that if you want._

_If Ri Omoshiroi, Starfire Shirane, and/or Narre (who never gives her last name) drop by, please tell them to drop everything and get themselves to Pyrite, battle teams and all. Ask directions for the Stalker Gym. Currently, all the other leaders but Moon are here. Moonish J's officially "missing" but Daisy swears up and down she was kidnapped. I believe her. Don't tell anyone about this but Ri, Starfire, and Narre. No, not Chobin either, you know he'll manage to spill it at the wrong minute._

_Also, you know that yoyo I left at your place this weekend? Could you give it to Cricket? I need it back ASAP._

_I'll have some more eggs for you by the end of the month. Next Saturday, check the storage system. Should be some eggs and baby 'mons waiting in the box, unless something goes horribly awry. If they're not there, contact Galileo and work it out with him._

_Astraea_.

Starfire blinked at the name. The mention of the Stalker gym definitely meant it was Raea. She hadn't known the other leader's full name, but that didn't really matter.

"Oh god," she murmured.

"_No kidding_," observed Shiala from her spot on the couch beside her. "_Not every day a gym leader gets kidnapped._"

"_How troubling,_" Night said thoughtfully. "_Perhaps it's linked to Regirock?_"

At the mention of the legendary's name and reminder of why she'd come to Dr. Kaminko in the first place, Starfire folded the letter to ponder over later. "Excuse me, Dr. Kaminko?"

"Yes?"

"I was wondering… what can you tell me about the legendary golems?"

Dr. Kaminko sighed and put down the pen he had been scribbling with while the Noctowl – Tytonidae, if Starfire remembered right – hooted dolefully. "I must admit, Regigigas is not my area of expertise. I can tell you very little that is not already common knowledge."

"That's fine," Starfire assured him. "Every little bit helps."

"Very well then. From what I have gathered from my fellow researchers in the Sinnoh region, Regirock, Registeel, and Regice are not so much powers in their own right, as they are extensions of Regigigas's will," Dr. Kaminko began. "Some believe that the four were originally one Pokémon, and separated due to reasons we can only guess at. Whatever their origin, it is universally agreed on that the lesser golems were sealed away with their master, and though the exact location is never quite clear, they are all sealed inside ruins located in a certain habitat – Regirock in the desert, Registeel in the mountains, and Regice by water or ice. Regigigas's location is never disclosed in any way.

"The reasons for the ancients' sealing away these golems is unknown, although it seems that they would have no reason to lock away those that the myths usually ascribe the roles of guardians to. It seems quite obvious that our ancestors feared these golems' immense power, but that does not seem to be motivation enough. We can find no records of this event, nor can we find definitive proof that the legends existed as anything other than various paintings and interpretations stretching back for millennia. Whether they caused a great disaster, or that mankind grew bitter at the power these golems wielded, or some other reason we can only speculate, the fact of the matter remains that our ancestors sealed them away and we have no idea why."

Starfire mulled this over for a few moments, and Dr. Kaminko resumed writing, leaving the only sounds in the room the monotonous ticking of the grandfather clock and the scratching of pen on paper.

"In other words," Starfire finally said, "the three golems are probably incredibly dangerous, and Regigigas even more so."

"In so many words, yes," Dr. Kaminko answered, not pausing in his work.

"Okay. I can work with that," Starfire declared, standing up. Night and Shiala climbed to their paws as well.

"Leaving so soon?" Dr. Kaminko inquired mildly.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, but Raea did say to come right away," Starfire smiled apologetically. "I hope you don't mind."

"Not at all. Do as you will," and with that, he waved her out. Starfire nearly bumped into Chobin, carrying a tray with an old teapot and three matching, chipped teacups as well as various snacks, and managed to sidestep him before practically running out the door. The disgruntled assistant marched into Dr. Kaminko's study.

"She didn't even stay for tea!" Chobin exclaimed. Each individual curl on his head seemed to be quivering with indignation. "How rude! And after all that effort!"

Dr. Kaminko ignored his assistant's whining. "You can't expect people to delay what they have to do," he told Chobin severely. "Miss Shirane was needed elsewhere, so it would have been far ruder of us to detain her."

Chobin huffed. "She could have at least said thank you," he pouted.

Dr. Kaminko didn't reply. Instead, he folded the letter he had just finished, sliding it inside an envelope. Quickly, he wrote the name and address that Tytonidae would deliver it to.

Lance Pendragon

_Sanctum Hotel, Rm. 616_

149 Anberlin Way

_Orre Colosseum_

* * *

Dick Fars was having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

It had started out as quite a pleasant day. Not very hot by the desert standards, and Atchi had come back from some town or other with a good deal of food. Although he'd intially been against the Inter-Regional League building a gym in the S.S. Libra, it hadn't been so bad, really.

But then the girl and her Skarmory fell from the sky.

Razor-bladed wings sliced through the hot desert air, sharp talons scraping into the weathered wood of the ship's deck as the Skarmory pulled sharply out of its dive and landed relatively neatly. The girl dismounted, standing serenely on black-socked feet beside the iron hawk. She glanced around and grinned, seeing Dick.

"Oh, hi," she greeted him. "So, you're the hobo that lives here?"

"Yes," Dick said warily, mildly offended at being called a hobo (even if it was true).

"Good. I didn't want to have to look for you. My name is Narre, and you have to go now," she said brightly.

"What?"

She pulled out a pair of Pokéballs and pressed the catch, releasing an Absol and a Houndoom from them. "Shoo." The two canines advanced, identical blood-red eyes trained on Dick.

"Hale, Disaster. Attack," Narre directed them.

The two Dark-types reacted at the same time, stepping forward in sync and lunging for the man, deadly fangs and claws bared. He dove to the side, narrowly avoiding them, and fumbled for his own Pokéball. Atchi appeared in a flash of white light, bellowing her battle cry.

"_Trooopiiii!_" the Grass-type roared.

"Aerial Ace and Fire Fang," Narre said.

"Fly!" Dick yelled.

With a surprising grace, Atchi took to the skies, narrowly dodging the Absol and Houndoom's attacks, only to be intercepted by the Skarmory the girl had arrived on.

"Drill Peck."

The Skarmory drove his bloodied beak into Atchi's forehead, gripping onto her with its claws. As it did so, the Absol and Houndoom took advantage of the fact all her attention was diverted into attempting to shake off the metal bird, leaping up by way of her long tail.

"Uh – Razor Leaf!" Dick shouted, thoroughly panicked.

Atchi tried to obey, the leaves that served her for wings suddenly swerving forward and back, becoming jagged and pointed as they raced for her attackers. The Skarmory and Absol dodged easily, though the Houndoom didn't bother, instead biting into the leafy appendage with a loud ripping sound. He tore off a good chunk of vibrant green leaf, which began to slowly ooze amber sap.

"Atchi!"

The Tropius roared, this time not out of defiance but in pain. She flapped her opposite wings wildly, attempting to remain in the air, but it was obvious she couldn't keep her bulk up. Swearing, Dick recalled her, the Absol and Houndoom falling the few feet to the deck as he did.

Before the light had completely faded, the girl advanced, her Pokémon falling in position around her. Dick stood nervously, surrounded and boxed in by the waist-high guardrail and a drop of twenty feet.

Narre leaned forward, smiling. "Nothing personal," she assured him.

Then she kicked him in the crotch with an inhuman lack of hesitation or pity.

Dick collapsed to his knees, world turned into fiery pain. Then the Skarmory moved forward, talons gripping his shirt collar and tossing him from the ship. With a yelp, he fell over the edge of the ship, falling about twenty feet to fall headfirst into the hot sand below. Narre walked over to peer down as the man scrambled to his feet and fled, painfully stumbling along through the sand. "Nice one," she congratulated her Pokémon. Disaster sniffed and turned away, while Hale began his victory strut, howling into the expanse of desert after his fleeing victim.

"_Fuck yeah!_"

"Shut up, Hale," Narre told the Houndoom absent-mindedly, fishing around in her pockets for her phone, which was blasting a Kaskade song at max volume. She pulled out the crimson phone and flipped it open.

"Damn lack of caller ID," she told the phone.

"Oh, he-_llo_, Narre," a girl's voice purred on the other end.

Narre grinned, brushing back a lock of brown hair. "_Psy-cho_," she responded. "Taking me up on that date, are we?"

A laugh. "Sure, if you feel like dragging that ass of yours over to Pyrite."

"Aw, and I just chased out the hobo too," Narre complained. "But anything for you," she added, smiling deviously.

"Good to know, lovergirl," Psycho said. "Oh, and bring your full team. Some shit is about to hit the fan."

"Gotcha," Narre replied. "Gonna tell me what?"

"Sure, when you get here. Don't feel like it now."

"Want to rethink that? Because I can't guarantee you won't be too… _distracted_."

"Oh, that reminds me, Strae banned us from her bathtub."

"What, _again_?"

"Yes, _again_."

"Well, I hear that's what that hotel in Pyrite is for," Narre drawled. "I'm sure they won't mind. Much."

Psycho laughed and hung up. Narre slipped the cell phone back into her pocket, making a mental note to blow her first paycheck on a better phone or something. "Hear that?" she asked her Pokémon team in general. "Time to haul ass to Pyrite."

* * *

A/N: I have such a bad habit of cutting out of scenes. C: LAZY YES, BUT FUN.

Also: WORDY WORDY WORDY. BLECH. KAMINKO'S LAB IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE AS LONG AS SOME OTHER CHAPTERS. D: I NEED TO STOP INFODUMPING. EVENTUALLY.


	5. Questions Without Answers

"You know, I think I could like Orre," Lance said, sleek black phone held to his ear. "If it weren't for the fact that it's hard to see the stars from here."

By _here_, Lance meant not only the hotel balcony he was standing in, or even the kind-of town that had sprung up around the Orre Colosseum, home to some of the most vicious fights to be found in or out of the Inter-Regional League, but Orre in general. Orre, after all, was renowned for its harshness, both of itself and its inhabitants. Stopping to look at the sky was not what most would take the time to do. Lance pitied them for it.

After all, there were many things written in the stars.

Cynthia Kurosawa knew exactly what he meant. "It is beautiful in Orre," she agreed, voice barely distorted by the miles of sand and sea that separated them. "But the desert is without pity, Lance. Remember that."

"Yeah," Lance agreed. "Orre reminds me of that old legend of the ice queen. Only, you know, in the non-arctic desert."

"The ice queen," Cynthia mused. "The Johto folktale passed down about the beautiful fey queen who ruled in what would later become the ice pass linking Mahogany and Blackthorn. The queen that took the mortal men who desired her to her bower, only to later consume their hearts and change their bodies into her eternal servants. Supposedly the Jynx line is the product of their union. Is that the one?"

"Yeah, her. Speaking of which, how's Lorelei?"

Cynthia burst into a fit of startled laughter, and Lance grinned. "Lance!" she scolded between giggles. "That's so incredibly _rude_."

"But funny," Lance countered.

"It is that," Cynthia allowed, though he could still hear the smile in her voice. "I can't blame you for still having a grudge against her, but she and Clair are being perfectly civil showing me around Sevii. The Tanoby Ruins are quite fascinating. Tsurumaru spends his free time examining the Tanoby Key, although Arceus only hopes he doesn't damage anything."

"Aw, you should trust him a bit more," Lance teased. "I mean, what's the worst that could happen, another legendary released rampantly upon the world?" Despite his best efforts to sound light-hearted, he couldn't completely hide the traces of tension he felt. Cynthia picked up on it instantly.

"Lance, it was bound to happen sometime," she told him gently. "As it was, things could have been worse, and they're not. Cerise Island is one of the oldest lands, right up there with Orre and Sinnoh. It will draw the myths and legends to itself, and with them will come the darkness that lies in men's hearts, inextricably linked. In the hands of a worse man, the world might have been thrown into darkness ten years ago."

"Ten years ago, I was the one who created the Shadowed Dragon," Lance said quietly, tracing the delicate ironwork railing with his free hand. "It's a miracle my clan didn't cast me out."

"That may be so, but you have spent the last ten years trying to repent. Don't you think it's time you started to forgive yourself?"

Lance had no answer (_if there's no truth, then nothing at all_).

"How is the situation in Orre?" Cynthia asked abruptly.

"Not as good as it could be," Lance admitted. "The Colosseum leaders still haven't changed their stance, and the Malo boy meddling with Acacia Sakaki didn't help any. Unless there is a drastic change, we may be looking at the full alliance of all the Colosseum leaders against the Orre leaders, and I don't like our odds."

"Is it true, what the rumors say? That Cipher is stirring again, like that foolhardy phoenix from its ashes?"

"I can't say for certain," Lance said, choosing his words carefully. "But the situation definitely doesn't look that far off."

"Be careful, Lance," Cynthia urged. "No matter how, ahem, _foolish_ the uniforms look, don't underestimate Cipher. They were the ones who found out how to override the Pokéball's identification mechanism and a Pokémon's own psychology, and they've only had ten years to get better. Don't push it."

"It'll be fine, Cyn," Lance reassured her. "I've survived worse."

He could almost imagine her full lips pursing in a mixture of irritation and thought. "I'm not so sure about that. Sendoff Spring is darker than ever. Cassandra Karasu believes it bodes ill, and I agree – Giratina is stirring. Only danger to itself or its kind, the most primordial and powerful legendaries, would elicit that. No matter what the rumors claim, you're still mortal."

He laughed, dryly, tiredly. "I know, Cyn. I know better than anyone." Subconsciously, he pressed one gloved hand to his chest (_breathe_).

"Please don't die," she told him plaintively. "It'd be very bad for us all if the sky emperor fell." _I'd miss you most of all_, he hears in her tone.

"I won't," he promised. "Mew strike me if I lie."

"Good luck."

"Same to you." He slid the cell phone shut, but didn't go inside just yet, despite the growing chill of the encroaching desert night.

_Only danger to the most primordial and powerful legendaries would elicit that response._

Despite his promise, Lance could feel his bones ache. He longed to take to the skies, to seek out this challenge to his authority, to seek out those who dared to strike out at the gods of old. Energy not entirely his own thrummed through his veins, demanded he begin the hunt of those who would be the hunters.

But then, he couldn't (_wouldn't? shouldn't?_). Not with his hands tied like _this_.

Lance forced himself to calm down, until the frantic beat of the war drums had completely vanished. He tilted his head back, trying to make out the stars through a haze of light pollution and the occasional blimp that drifted across the sky. He wondered if his prayer for the swift return of Cynthia, Clair, and Lorelei to Johto could be heard if the constellation that represented Celebi, the pathfinder, couldn't even be seen. He wondered what would happen if he gave into the urge to attack _now_. He wondered why he was still waiting, hooded, in the mews, when he could be soaring through the skies, if only he disregarded the fate of the Blackthorn clan. He wondered exactly how far Cipher's network expanded, exactly how far he could push before they pushed back.

But mostly he wondered why he was so damn helpless.

_Long live the celestial emperor._

* * *

Kris Malo kneaded his forehead with his knuckles, trying to suppress the headache he felt coming on. He hadn't expected becoming a gym leader to be this stressful when he'd accepted in Altomare. Then again, he hadn't expected to be one of the oldest and more mature, especially considering most of the other Orre leaders were girls younger and slightly more insane than he was.

Well, _more_ than slightly, he amended, as Piez and Raea started making bets on how long it would take Bunny to get out of Narre's headlock, while Starfire and Ri's conversation about some Japanese anime or other was fast approaching the half-hour mark.

"Can we please do something constructive?" Kris grumbled, hot chocolate clutched in one hand. _And get drinks from somewhere besides Starbucks_, he added mentally. _Why is that frickin' everywhere?_

"Sure, mom," Raea said snippily, playing with her hair. "Right after you tell us where to start looking for Moon."

"What, it's not obvious?" Piez asked. "Cipher, no duh."

"Yeah, but _where_?" Raea asked, ever the pessimist. "Orre's frickin' huge, remember?"

Ri looked up from her conversation with Starfire. "They're not on Citadark," she assured the teens, speaking with an authority a twelve-year-old shouldn't have. "Lorelei would've chased them out and all."

"One place down, a million more to go," Raea grumbled.

Bunny elbowed Narre in the stomach and slid out of her grasp, sitting down on the top of the couch beside Raea. "Aw, cheer up Strae, Moon's fine," Bunny reassured the shorter girl. "Besides, you're mean when you get worried."

"Shut up," Raea ordered half-heartedly.

"You first. Being a bitch is my job," Narre said cheerfully, rearranging her corset strings, obviously unfazed by Bunny's jab.

Kris resisted the urge to laugh or roll his eyes. "Aaaanyway," he drawled. "Can we get back to the subject?"

"You tell me," Piez said. "Or do you know something about Cipher we don't?"

Kris shrugged. "Cipher never really got famous in Altomare," he said matter-of-factly. "Anything interesting happen to anyone in… the last week or so?"

"Ooh, the new episode of Shugo Chara came out!" Ri volunteered excitedly, completely off-track.

"Does chasing off a hobo count?" Narre wondered.

"London graffitied Club Krabby and I got paid twenty bucks for it," Piez recalled.

"Not unless the fact Uncle Kam found my yoyo counts," Raea answered.

"Miles played a _love song_ on his trumpet on Tuesday," Bunny cooed. "Oh, and Narcy stole his underwear."

"Narcissus is such a perv," Raea mumbled, grinning despite herself.

"Auction it on eBay," Narre advised Bunny. "Betcha rich boy spent a thousand on his underwear, and it's _used_."

"No way! Miles's underwear is mine! Well, and Narcy's, but mostly mine!"

Starfire snapped her fingers. "I broke into the Desert Ruins and found Regirock, except it disappeared the next day," she offered. "That counts, right?"

Six pairs of eyes turned to stare at her. "Seriously?" Piez asked.

"Uh-huh. Didn't get a picture of _Regirock_, but…" Starfire fished around in her bag, producing the pictures she had taken of the writing on the wall. She passed them around, continuing, "Those were on the walls of the Desert Ruin. Regirock was inside, but then I think there was a battle, and now Regirock's nowhere to be found."

Narre squinted at the pictures Ri handed over. "What language is this supposed to be?" she asked dubiously, rotating it to see if it suddenly made sense.

Bunny snatched them, then scowled and passed them on to Kris. "Something really old," she guessed.

"It's sure not Italian," Kris said dryly.

Piez leaned over his shoulder, peering closely at it. "Mhm. It doesn't resemble anything I've seen," she admitted. "Except Braille, maybe."

Raea held out her hand, and Kris gave the pictures to her. "This looks like my world history textbook," she complained. "Not the Sevii pictographs or Orre's own cuneiform writing. And it's definitely not the string documentation that they used in Hoenn's mountains. I'm guessing maybe Sinnoh's old religious language?"

"I thought that was Latin," Bunny objected. "Those dots and slashes aren't Latin."

"I think they had an old writing system before they adopted Johto's characters," Raea shrugged. "Point is, can anyone translate this into Anglicized characters?"

Silence.

"Psycho might," Narre volunteered, sinking into one of Raea's numerous beanbag chairs. "If this is Regirock, she probably knows something about it."

"Never pegged her for a golem girl," Piez commented.

"Tch, she's just a Hoenn girl," Narre said dismissively. "Ruby and Sapphire and Emerald, those games. I heard the retards who programmed it made Braille the Regi language."

"This – " Starfire waved her hand in the general direction of the photographs " – is not Braille."

Cue several variations of "No, _really_?", each less polite than the last.

"Anyway," Kris interrupted, "What does Regirock have to do with anything?"

"Besides the obvious?" Bunny asked cheerfully.

Piez took pity on the Altomare native. "Okay, so. You know how Cipher went and Shadowified Johto's legendary beasts nine years ago? Biscuit never was purified in the first place, Auslaufen got purified and then he got stolen back and re-Shadowified, only _better_. Oh, and we think Entei died and was reborn as Raion, who we're pretty sure is not Shadow," Piez added, referring to, in turn, her own Suicune, Narre's Raikou, and her gym trainer's, Spotty's, Entei.

"Okay, so?"

"_So_, they tried to do the same thing with the legendary birds four years ago, except what's-his-face – yanno, that kid with the scooter – and the Inter-Regional League kicked Cipher's collective ass," Piez explained. "Cipher has some kind of fixation with Shadowifying legendary trios."

"Which includes the Regis," Kris concluded.

"Good job, Kris!" Raea clapped sardonically. "And now that we know this, the point is?"

"Ooh, ooh, I know this one!" Bunny cheered. "Now we go check out the Oasis and Cave Ruins, right?"

"Oh yeah, those," Raea muttered. "Good thing all those friggin' tourists already ditched them."

"There's two ruins," Starfire pointed out. "Are we splitting up or what?"

"We're going in two groups," Kris decided. "Piez, Starfire, and Ri to the cave, and Bunny, Raea, and I to the oasis."

"Ahem," Narre coughed. "One, I'm not in a group. Two, why are we listening to you?"

"Because I'm more sane than all of you combined," Kris deadpanned. "Besides, you get to stay here and run the base of operations. Not to mention we need someone to stay behind and monitor news channels and so on."

"Or hack into the Inter-Regional League's database when you get bored," Raea advised. "Didja know Cynthia and Steven got their butts trounced when they tried to gang up on Lance?"

"Epic fail right there," Piez chimed in, propping her chin on her hands.

Kris raised his hand. "Can we not talk about how much the League fails, no matter how funny it is?" he inquired. "We should probably be set to leave in, er, half an hour sound good?"

Raea groaned. "We're going to be bossed around the whole way, I can feel it," she told Bunny.

* * *

Delicate fingers brushed her cheek. "Wake up, Miss J."

Moon awoke with a start, Riley de Muerta's startlingly light eyes gazing into her own. A mild moment of panic overcame her, and she flinched away. He let his hand drop with no further comment and stood, the metal cuffs around her ankles detaching from the truck's floor as he did so – probably the Gallade's work, Moon figured. She managed to get to her feet with her wrists and ankles still bound, and although Moon wasn't quite sure how she could manage to get up stairs, level ground should be manageable – at least, she sincerely hoped so. It would be very, very embarrassing to trip and land on her face in front of her captor (and his… ah… prettiness didn't help matters).

The truck had come to a stop within a vast, underground lot, which appeared to be carved from dark, grainy stone. Various other vehicles, some as old as the truck they'd come in, some obviously much newer, were scattered throughout it. It appeared to be utterly devoid of life besides Moon and Riley, as well as the Gallade, Gabriel.

"Come along," Riley said softly, standing a bit too close for personal comfort. "We should get moving soon."

Dazed and still disoriented, Moon allowed Riley to lead her up and out of the lot. She barely noticed Gabriel, who tailed them like a living shadow. Instead, her attention was focused on Riley – how each shift of the light caused shadows to play across his skin, the languid grace of his movements, the slight, rhythmic sway of his dark hair.

Who was he exactly, she wondered, and why was he working with Cipher?

After a short walk, they emerged into a bright, dazzlingly lit hallway, completely at odds with the dark lot they'd just left. The only thing the sterile, monotonous hall seemed to have in common with it was their vastness, extending in both directions for a good while before sharply turning a ninety-degree angle corner.

Waiting for them, sitting against the wall, was a girl that looked to be Moon's own age. She all but leapt to her feet as the door swung open, smiling brightly. Moon disliked her on the spot, although it was mostly due to the Snag Machine that glimmered darkly on the other brunette's left arm.

"Hey, Riley," she greeted him flirtatiously, completely ignoring Moon and Gabriel (admittedly, Moon had been ignoring the Gallade too). "Bossman said you'd be here soon."

"Miss Strigiforme," Riley responded, tone as politely neutral as ever, which Moon noted with vague relief.

"Owly, remember?" the girl corrected, completely undeterred. "Walk your pet to the containment center, get your Snag Machine, and meet me at the west gate. We have a new assignment."

Moon bristled at both the Cipher girl's tone and being called a pet, although she knew better than to lash back.

"Understood," Riley said. "This assignment is?"

She laughed. "To whittle away those Orre gyms one by one, obviously," Owly answered. "Until the Shadow King is completed."

This statement told Moon a multitude of things. One, Cipher actively had something against the Orre leaders, not just her. Two, Cipher considered the leaders a threat, or the two wouldn't have orders to take them on one at a time. And three, this "Shadow King" was not good. Probably like that XD001 fiasco four years back (admittedly, Moon had a hard time taking anything with a smiley face in its name seriously). Of course, it also told Moon she would dearly love to punch the Cipher girl's face in, but that wasn't very important at the moment.

"See ya, Riley," Owly sauntered away, the heels of her boots clacking against the white tile.

Riley didn't bother to glance after her, or at Moon. Instead, he briefly drew one hand out of his hoodie pocket to tuck a stray lock of hair behind his ear and continued walking in the opposite direction. Moon followed him without a word, mind racing.

"Miss J?"

Moon blinked, realizing they'd walked a lot farther than she thought they had – and she hadn't been paying attention so she had no way to tell which was way out (_damn_). Riley had stopped in front of a door, which looked pretty much identical to every other door she could remember passing, with the exception of the number plate that hung at eye level – _CE-91_. Not that that helped Moon any.

"This is where you will be staying until further notice," Riley told her. "You will be given three meals a day, and allowed various, reasonable requests. However, you will not be able to see your Pokémon, access to any communication system, and anything that might result in your escape. I apologize if this displeases you."

Moon eyed him. "You're apologizing for kidnapping me."

Riley said nothing, meeting his gaze with hers. She looked away first.

"If it's any consolation, I can promise your Pokémon will not be harmed," he said softly. "They will be returned to you in the same condition, though I can't say the same about your egg, which may very well hatch while you are with us."

"Why are you doing this?" The question came out harsher than she had intended.

"Doing this?"

"Being… I don't know… _nice_!" Moon struggled.

"If I was 'nice', I would have let you go by now," Riley told her, utterly unfazed. "As it is, you are remaining here, stripped of your freedom and your Pokémon. I will target your friends one by one, to remove them from the stage, by whatever means are necessary. And this will lead to your eventual destruction at the hands of the Colosseum leaders, who have far more reason than I to be cruel. I am hardly 'nice', Miss J."

Moon heard a warning in his voice. She ignored it.

* * *

Once upon a time, Orre was very fertile, prosperous, and as full as life as verdant Hoenn or industrial Kanto. That had changed millennia ago, according to the legends handed down by word-of-mouth in both human and Pokémon tales, when the serene meadows and lush forests gave way to sand and salt, with the exception of the northern mountains and forests. Legend had it that, with this, most of the wild Pokémon had crossed the seas, or into the northern plains, leaving the humans to their own fate. Still, it was commonly held that there were still Pokémon surviving in Orre, besides the ones that were trained or family companions. Those Pokémon were just much less numerous and much more crafty than their counterparts in the other regions.

Only four years ago, wild Pokémon had begun to return to Orre – only to disappear again before a year had been finished. While the reason for this sudden migration had yet to be known, the three areas they had flocked to had been discovered and named by Abraham Duking – the Desert, Oasis, and Cave Pokéspots. Soon after the wave of Pokémon had come and gone, however, eyewitnesses swore on their dead aunt Sally's grave that ruins had risen out of the earth and swallowed the Pokéspots. Subsequently, Duking's Pokéspots were renamed the Desert, Oasis, and Cave Ruins ("In case it wasn't obvious enough," one ONBS reporter quipped).

None of which particularly mattered to the three teens who had intruded upon the Oasis Ruins.

"… So," Raea finally broke the silence.

"God, this thing is huge," Kris said, craning back his neck to take it in properly.

"That's what I said when Miles – " Bunny began.

"Shut up, Bunny," Raea said cheerfully. "You'll scar Kris."

Kris ignored them both. "So, how do we get inside?" he asked dubiously. The massive block of ice was huge, thick enough to be opaque and refusing to melt in the otherwise near-tropical heat.

"Starfire said she broke the Desert Ruin," Bunny said. "So we break this?"

"Aw, come on, that's work," Raea complained.

"You brought three Fire-types and a fourth that _could_ be a Fire-type. Oh, and that Salamence. Don't whine," Kris reminded her.

"So I like fire," Raea rolled her eyes. "Isn't there an easier way?"

"Actually, it's pretty likely," Kris admitted. "If Cipher _did_ steal Regirock, they've probably already stolen Regice and Registeel too, or at least started on it. I'm not sure if it'll be good or bad if they have."

"How do we know if they have and where the tunnel is?" Bunny asked interestedly.

"No idea," Kris said bluntly. "We're probably going to have to search by hand."

"Let's just break a new hole and see if we can find a hidden entrance from the inside," Raea said brightly. "It'll be easier, and the tombs are manmade anyway, so we probably won't bring the wrath of any legendaries down on ourselves."

"What if Cipher wasn't here and we just made it easier for them?" Kris objected.

"Whoever captured Regirock could break a ruin if they wanted," Raea waved it off dismissively.

Kris rolled his eyes. "Go ahead, then."

Raea grinned, and pulled two Pokéballs from where they were fastened to her wrists. Two Pokémon burst out – a Ninetales and a Rapidash, fairly standard fire Pokémon for a Johto girl. "Kerr, Darley, I want you to break a hole in that ruin," she directed them, gesturing at the sheer ice face. "Burn one that's large enough for all of us to go through… three by three, I think." The Ninetales – Kerr – promptly threw back her head and let out a bone-chilling howl, but instead of the customary darkening sky associated with a Ninetales' demonic abilities, the sun began to blaze brighter, unnaturally so. At the same time, the Rapidash, Darley, pranced forward, fire gathering around her hooves, before accelerating into a charge, colliding head-on with the ice obelisk, her Flare Blitz strengthened by Kerr's Sunny Day.

"Oh, I'll help," Bunny reached for her own Pokéballs, producing a light blue and lavender Ninetales in a flash of spiraling blue light and indigo sparkles. There was also the faint scent of, predictably, lavender.

"Been splurging on custom Seals, have we?" Kris eyed the Pokéball, as Kerr unleashed a Heat Wave and Darley prepared another attack.

Bunny giggled, but didn't answer. "Blair, help Raea's 'mons break that, kay?" She scratched the Ninetales behind the ears once before stepping back. The male Ninetales breathed out a gentle stream of blue fire, which quickly consumed the oxygen in its path and slammed into the ice a full foot in diameter.

Slowly, the ice melted, weakening under the combined efforts of the three Pokémon. Darley stopped her charges, inspecting the ice shrewdly before turning and delivering a swift Double Kick. The ice cracked under the pressure, then caved in completely. Although the edges were jagged and a bit smaller than would be comfortable (for Kris and Bunny, anyway), it was definitely an entrance.

"Nice kick," Raea congratulated Darley, as the Sunny Day faded away. "Though Kerr, you might want to watch your Heat Waves. You tend to overexaggerate when Sunny Day is in play." Bunny didn't bother with words, throwing her arms around Blair's neck and hugging the Ninetales for all she was worth.

"Ahem," Kris coughed. "Time to get moving here."

"Oh, shut up, you didn't even do anything," Raea said. "Kerr, lead the way. Darr, you're taking rear guard. Ken's not coming out if we can help it. I'm pretty sure you've guessed we're facing an Ice-type by now."

"_Like it wasn't completely obvious_," Kerr said dryly.

"Only if Regice is still in there," Kris pointed out.

"Details," Raea responded. Kerr padded in first, followed by Blair once Bunny released him. Raea trailed the two Ninetales, and Kris, Bunny, and Darley headed in after her.

The ice obelisk seemed just as vast on the inside, and quite cold, sealed by three-feet thick ice walls on all sides. They sharply turned and converged into a distant point overhead, vaguely evoking the inside of a cathedral. Although it wasn't quite dark, it wasn't exactly light inside the ruin either. Again, there were barely visible dots and slashes cut into the ice, although they were interrupted on the far side by another hole, which was blocked up with what looked like a new layer of ice in a vaguely starburst shape.

"Told you it'd be easier to find," Raea said, pointing to the other entrance.

"I was the one who said there might _be_ a tunnel in the first place," Kris argued.

"So?"

Bunny ignored the bickering as Narcissus released himself from his Pokéball, standing at his trainer's side in a swirl of soft, violet-pink light.

"Is that sakura?" Raea interrupted herself.

"Narcy likes flowers," Bunny answered brightly. "So, Narcy, whaddya see?"

The Gardevoir closed his eyes. When he opened them again, a faint blue-white light glowed, threatening to blur the lines between his pupils, irises, and sclera. "_There is no other life here_," he said, voice echoing faintly, as if a second person was speaking a millisecond late. "_I do not foresee an attack_."

"Well, that's crap," Raea decided.

"Sounds like Cipher came and went," Kris mulled. "Go check it out anyway?"

"Hell yes," Raea and Bunny chorused in unison, then grinned. Again, Kerr and Blair led the way to a flight of uneven spiral stairs that seemed to be roughly hewn from the cold, hard ground. Narcissus had to help Bunny down several tight turns, especially as her plastic wings kept knocking into the walls (to Kris's irritation, as he was standing behind them).

"Well, damn," Raea announced, once they had reached the bottom. The chamber the group entered was vast and empty of life, floors and walls coldly glimmering in the pale light of Will-O-Wisps the two Ninetales had produced.

"Looks like there was a battle here," Kris noted, stepping around the girls to get a better look. "Someone was flinging around Flame Wheels. I'd say an Arcanine or – "

" – Infernape," Bunny finished for him. "Not scattered enough to be Typhlosion."

"Yeah. Also, some other fast, agile Fighting-type, judging by some of that damage to the walls. Maybe a Lucario?"

"Kabutops too," Raea interrupted. "Some of the cracks refroze a little – probably from the cold – but not very well. They look like leftovers from an indoor Rain Dance, and a bladed Pokémon if the slashes are anything to go by. Kabutops fits the bill."

"Stop showing me up," Kris grumbled. "Anyway, those cracks might have been Regice too. Not like it wasn't going to try to freeze everything."

"Too small an area," Bunny disagreed. "Actually, I'm surprised that the only obvious Fire signs are from a Flame Wheel or whatever. I think some legends say that the Regis would commit suicide if they got close to capturing, and go all 'boom explodey time', yanno?"

"Never heard of that, but you're Hoenn born, not me," Raea said, shoving her hands deeper into the pockets of her black hoodie. "Can we go now? It's frickin' freezing."

Kris rolled his eyes. "We might as well get back," he agreed. "We should tell the others."

* * *

The small hovercar screeched into a turn, which, if it had actually had tires, probably would have caused it to flip over. As it was, the hovercar's antigravity mechanism kicked into place, keeping it upright, and its driver continued at the same near-breakneck pace.

"You're a very bad driver," Riley commented from his seat in the back, seatbelt plaintively buckled. Gabriel sat shotgun, seatbelt obviously _not_ buckled, eyeing Owly like he would leap over and wrench the wheel from her hands at any time.

"Whatever," Owly responded cheerfully, cutting her speed from ninety to sixty. "It's not like cactuses are everywhere, right?"

Riley saw Gabriel roll his eyes, obviously wishing to make one of many possible responses to that, one of which probably involved how the plural of cactus was actually cacti. Gabriel had a thing for languages, never mind he couldn't speak most of them. Neither of them spoke, and Owly kept driving, thankfully slower.

"I'd say at this rate we can get into Phenac by nightfall," Owly said abruptly. "Might be pointless to stop there, though. Coniglia's Twitter says she went to Pyrite four days ago."

"_Neither of us would have you driving after dark_," Gabriel interjected, telepathic voice vaguely irritated.

"Tch. So supportive, the both of you," Owly teased. "Phenac it is. We can get a hotel room, hmm?"

"_Please do not distract my trainer with your attempt at a mating ritual,_" Gabriel requested. Riley did not bother to comment on that.

"It's not a mating ritual, I'm hitting on him," Owly explained patiently. "Get with the times, Gabe. Why do you care anyway?" She jerked suddenly on the steering wheel to avoid a small group of Nidoran, ignoring their Nidorino leader's angry bellow after the hovercar. Gabriel scowled out the window at the Nidorino and didn't answer.

"So where are we going after Phenac?" Owly asked abruptly. "And how long are we staying?"

"Does it matter?" Riley inquired.

"What, how long we're in Phenac? Sure it does! If we're staying a while, I can see if I can barge in on Miles, yanno? Coniglia's Twitter mentions taking stalking lessons from the Pyrite girl so she can stalk him."

"You do know a good bit about Miss Coniglia," Riley observed. "Or do you listen to all of your enemies' twittering?"

"Don't be stupid, they don't all _have_ Twitters," Owly dismissed him. "But yeah, I do kinda know more about Coniglia than the other leaders. Was best friends with her from… hold on… thirteen years ago up to three years ago. That was before her sparklyprissy coordinator days though."

"Is that the reason your Clefable is purple and male?" Riley wondered, not really caring if he received an answer.

"What, Fidi? Yeah. She gave him to me after her family's Clefable spawned everywhere. Good times," Owly smiled, reminiscing, before she yelped and slammed on the hovercar's brakes in order to avoid sailing over the lip of a small cliff that extended twenty feet into the air.

Riley sighed. "I really shouldn't ask you to talk and drive at the same time," he mused. "Perhaps I shouldn't ask you to drive at all."

"Too bad, I called driver," Owly snorted, carefully steering the hovercar backwards, off of the cliff. "Why am I doing all the secret-spilling anyway? Don't you have anything you want to share?"

"_No,_" Gabriel answered for Riley.

Owly shrugged. "Your call." She turned the car roughly south and accelerated, leaving the drop far behind them.

* * *

Narre ripped open another pack of peppered jerky, tossed a few strips over her shoulder to Tasty and Katy, and sat back onto a beanbag chair. After nearly braining Dwi with some unidentified meat she'd brought in a little baggie, the maneater leader picked up her laptop and continued where she'd left off, ignoring the mess her three caterpillars were making on Raea's floor.

There was surprisingly little on Lance Pendragon, considering. Sure there were the bland vanilla details about his dual heritage, a descendant of the Blackthorn clan on his father's side, a child of the Viridian forest on his mother's. There were about five boring paragraphs of prattle about how he had been the youngest person to conquer Kanto's Pokemon League at the age of twelve, and then disappeared for three years before joining the Inter-Regional League at the age of fifteen. Supposedly Lance had signed up for political power or whatever, which was mostly denied to him being the son of a descendant of the main Blackthorn line who had promptly ditched Blackthorn as soon as he'd come of age.

"Like fuck that was it," Narre muttered to herself. She couldn't say for certain, but Pendragon never seemed the type to give a crap about politics, and no one just _joined_ the Inter-Regional League. Partly because it was difficult to even be offered a position, partly because it was difficult to ever get _out_. The other two Inter-Regional Champions had pretty obvious motivations – Cynthia Kurosawa for easier access to other authorities on the Pokemon mythology, and Steven Stone for the publicity of Devon Corporation. Lance did not.

"Bet he fucked up pretty hard," Narre informed her three Pokemon. Tasty and Katy ignored her, playing a heated "game" of tug-of-war over the last piece of jerky, although Dwi looked up and tried to snarl at her in a way he evidently thought resembled a Sharpedo.

Narre crossed her eyes at the Weedle and was about to turn back to finding blackmail-worthy information when the gym's video phone rang, blaring a DDR song rather than the traditional shrill ring. It stopped just as quickly, and Raea's Gardevoir was standing in the doorway. _"Excuse me, Miss Narre_," she said politely. "_But Miss Pastryton is on the line and would like to speak to you."_

Narre sighed and got to her feet, walking past the Gardevoir to the videophone set up in the next room. Piez was on the other line, with what was probably a mountain in the background, although the image was distorted by slight static. Apparently Piez's phone had a video and speakerphone option, because Narre could also hear Starfire and Ri arguing about some new anime or other in the background.

"So, how'd it go?" Narre asked, utterly indifferent.

"Registeel _was_ here, but now it's gone," Piez informed her. "We're pretty sure it's Cipher."

"Uh-huh. Oh, hold on." A blinking blue icon of a phone with cartoon sound waves appeared in the upper right corner. Narre jabbed at it, and the touch screen responded by shunting Piez's screen over to the right, distorting it to fit, and juxtaposing Bunny standing in front of the Oasis Ruin. Why did everyone else have a decent phone? "Hey, Bun-buns," Narre greeted her.

"Naaaaaarre, Regice isn't here and it's friggin' cold," Bunny whined.

"Registeel isn't here either," Piez interjected.

"Oh hey, Piez is on! HEY PIEZ!" Bunny nearly shrieked gleefully into the phone. Narre and Piez both winced, while on Bunny's side, Raea erupted into swears off-screen. "My bad!" Bunny yelled over at Raea.

"I will throttle you with a safety pin – " Bunny quickly switched off speakerphone before Raea could continue her threat.

"So, uh, yeah," Bunny said. "Um, Kris wants me to tell you guys we didn't find Regice, but Cipher was probably here and stuff. Oh, and they tried to hide their entrance too, but it's really obvious from the inside."

"The Cave Ruin was like that too," Piez interjected. "Didn't take Molly very long to find it though."

"So we're going with the Cipher took all the Regis and kidnapped Moon theory," Narre summarized. "There's nothing good on Lance on any of the official sites. Do you realize how fucking weird that is?"

"No?" Bunny and Piez chorused.

"Well, it is," Narre told them. "I'm going to screw around some. Take your time getting back."

"Hold on a sec," Piez said. "Did you find Psych?"

"Nah, can't find her. She's probably in the Under causing chaos or something," Narre answered. "She'll show up eventually."

"Figures," Piez sighed. "Whatever, as long as she didn't get kidnapped either. See you guys later, then."

"Right."

"Kay!"

* * *

Psycho felt at home in the Under, which was more than most people could say.

For starters, the Under was _dark_. Most people would say "no, _really_?", but then, most people underestimated the psychological effect of cave darkness. Total darkness awakened a primeval fear of predators, those things in the dark. The eerie, unnatural neon lights that flickered weakly here and there didn't alleviate that very much – yes, it was light, but it was a completely unfamiliar one.

And then, there was the fact that there was no one _in_ it. This was mostly due to the fact the Under should have been destroyed over five years ago, leading to the evacuation of it. Still, there were certain bums and squatters that would never leave, which had resulted in a frustrated lockdown. Not very well enforced, as Psycho had discovered, easily and often slipping between the Under and the aboveground world.

Neither of these was enough to stop Psycho, of course.

The girl walked through the darkness, her main source of light the Infernape at her side, whose fiery mane threw off more than enough light to navigate by. AK-47 loped alongside his master, completely and utterly devoid of trivial human fears sparked by the Under. And, to a certain extent, so was she.

Utterly bored by a scant five minutes of walking, Psycho stopped to reach into her bag and extract a small handgun from one pocket. AK-47 waited patiently as his trainer sighted, cocked the pistol, and shot once, twice, three times. Three cracks rang out sharply, echoing in the cavernous Under.

"Damn, missed twice," Psycho noted, letting her gun arm fall. "My teacher would be ashamed, wouldn't she?"

AK-47 didn't bother to answer the obvious questions, or to ask what she had aimed for in the first place.

Psycho sighed. "Oh well. I can practice later," she decided, putting her gun back into her bag. "Why did those kids have their network so far away from the gym?" she grumbled, never mind the Under's network had existed nine years ago before the gym had even been thought of.

The two continued in relative silence, navigating the network of crumbling buildings and rusted catwalks with the ease born of long practice. Eventually, they came to the chasm that split the Under even farther, dividing the majority of the underground city from the other half, where the once-grand Deep Colosseum stood.

"Pity they never fixed that," Psycho remarked to AK-47. And she had to admit, the Colosseum didn't look that bad. It was a large structure, dome-shaped and stuffed full of symmetrical Greco-Roman architecture that had probably been lifted from old drawings of Sinnoh's ancient temples, though Psycho couldn't see the details from where she stood. She probably didn't want to, anyway – the years of neglect had pretty much reduced the Colosseum to a pile of crumbling metal and stone. AK-47 didn't respond, instead turning away from the Colosseum to follow the chasm. Psycho rolled her eyes and followed the Infernape, muttering something about how Shadows just did _not_ make good small talk. Ever.

Eventually, they reached a slightly less ramshackle building, disconnected from its neighbors and the network of catwalks. Psycho stepped past the boulder that stood squarely in the center of the single entrance, patting its markered surface absently. AK-47 followed her in, but swung up into the steel rafters, leaving his trainer a relative measure of privacy. Psycho crossed the room to what was clearly a PC, however old and fading its red paint might have been, however grimy the screen. She accessed the Pokémon storage system, typing in her ID number and password.

_Welcome, Marylouisse Yukicia_, the screen blipped at her. Psycho smirked before closing the welcome screen, moving on to the many boxes. She had errands to run, after all, and no time to waste smirking at the computer's ignorance.

* * *

A/N: So this chapter was going to be longer, but I decided there were too many words and broke it into two parts. I was getting sick of writing more than ten pages a chapter, even if that only happened once (not that I didn't this time… ). I still don't like this chapter very much.

DAMNIT OWLY. DON'T KILL RILEY WITH YOUR HORRIBLE DRIVING. HE'S TOO BISHIE TO DIE.

… Also haha Sumer reference. I'm such a dork. |D


	6. So You Say You Want a Revolution

"My brother told me something, once," Acacia Sakaki said, effortlessly holding her phone in place with one shoulder, as both her hands were occupied with rebraiding her thick red hair. "For every person you can trust, there will be three more you want to leave to the Sharpedo. Do you know how fucking weird it is that he got the numbers right?"

"How nice," the teenaged voice on the other end answered dryly. "I'm sure Giovanni was quite a respectable man."

"Feh, respectable," Acacia snorted in disdain. "Call Johnnyboy smart, call him ruthless, call him motherfuckin' crazy, but respectable doesn't fit."

"I forgot you don't respond well to diplomacy," Miles Brandt sighed.

"You're a nancy-boy, not me," Acacia said primly. "I'm Sevii-born, Saffron-raised. My idea of diplomacy is showing up with a gun and a sandwich and asking which one you'd rather have shoved down your throat."

"Charming."

"I _know._ You sound like you're eating something. Are you?"

"Yes."

"Don't talk with your mouth open," Acacia admonished Miles gleefully.

"You aren't exactly one to talk about manners," Miles pointed out. "It's just an English muffin in any case."

"Aaaaw, Miles, did you skip lunch again? You're gonna get fat if you keep eating whenever you feel like it," the woman needled. "And _then_ where will you be without your devoted fangirl, what's-her-face Coniglia, hmm?"

Acacia could picture Miles rolling his eyes. "She does seem rather incompetent, doesn't she? Still, I don't believe it would do to underestimate_ them_."

"'I don't believe it would do to underestimate them,'" Acacia mocked, absolutely butchering Miles's British accent. "If anything, we're probably _over_estimating them."

"Don't be so sure," Miles cautioned. "I've heard rumors about them. Most of them have reached regional champion level, if not more. Miss Coniglia battled Wallace at the Hoenn Cup and utterly destroyed him, never mind the points the coordinators gave her for it. Moonish J fought at regional level when she was eleven, and reigned as Kanto's Champion for three years. Narre Nyaonoko conquered Sinnoh's League in less than a year. _You_ should know more about the Pastryton girl than I do. And that's not even counting what Malo and Athanasia have done."

"What, be delinquents?" Acacia responded acidly. "Why are _you_ so impressed, Mr. Better-Than-You? Don't answer that."

"Duly noted," Miles said. There was a moment of silence as Miles presumably polished off the remainder of his muffin while Acacia finished braiding her thick hair.

"Well, rich boy, see ya never," Acacia told the phone cheerfully.

"Enjoy ruining another person's life," Miles said somewhat grumpily.

"Oh, I will," Acacia assured him, tossing her long braid back over her shoulder. "But first, I have a race to win."

* * *

"So, in short, we have no clue what to do next," Piez summed up.

Cue moment of awkward silence, punctuated only by the unceasing sounds of Narre's keyboard and Piez's chewing gum. "Maybe we're going about it wrong," Kris suggested from his spot on the couch. "We're focusing too much on the Regis when it's Cipher itself we want."

"Screw that, I have to go now," Raea announced, snatching her hoodie back from the chair she'd dumped it on. "Start again in the morning or something, kay-thanks-bye." She vaulted over the couch and headed straight for the door.

"Hey, where the hell are you going?" Kris protested.

"Racing, no duh," Raea said dryly, pivoting to glare him down. "I already skipped out for two days right when Acacia Sakaki got back into town. One day, fine. Two, I'll live it down. Three, there goes my reputation."

"Is your reputation more important than making sure Moon's safe?" Kris argued.

"… You don't want me to answer that," Raea replied, snatching up a Net Ball from the side table shoved against the wall.

"For fuck's sake, Strae, do you really want to just leave Moon to the Ciphers without doing anything?" Kris demanded.

"Aw, shut up, Kris," Narre told him, not really defending Raea so much as antagonizing Kris and dissuading distractions. "You have anything better to do?" she inquired, not looking up from her laptop.

Raea tossed the Net Ball from one hand to the other before minimizing it and slipping it into her pocket. "I'll be back safely, mom," she informed Kris snidely. "I've got places to be, people to see, and a race to win." With that, the Pyrite leader stepped out, swinging the door shut behind her.

* * *

Gateon was serene as it ever got at sunset, as children and their parents hurried home before night fell and the port became alive again with activity, mostly a less family-friendly crowd than was awake during the daylight hours. This did not bother the small Cipher team, although many other things did.

"It's right fucking there!" Owly said exasperatedly, brandishing the crumpled tourist map in her right hand. "How the hell can you keep driving by it?"

Gabriel ignored her irritation, continuing to drive the hovercar with an unexpected proficiency. He certainly wasn't worse than Owly, though that would have been hard to accomplish. Riley also ignored her, iPod headphones blocking out the brunette's complaints with resonant chords rather than the rock Owly had insisted on locking the hovercar's radio into.

Riley felt the hovercar decelerating, then coming to a complete stop. He opened his eyes to see Gabriel deactivating the hover mechanism and stepping out, tossing Riley the keys to prevent Owly from seizing them again. Riley caught the keys and pocketed them, glancing around as he did.

Gateon Gym was not a traditional gym as the Inter-Regional League saw it. This was mostly because the Gym was not a traditional gym building – instead, the Lighthouse had been renovated to include a battlefield and living space on the two highest floors. A tacky neon sign spelled out "GATEON GYM" in green and blue. A piece of laminated paper was duct-taped to the bottom, which Riley assumed was the gym leader's equivalent of a notice that she was currently not in the gym or available for battling.

Which was perfectly fine with them, of course, since Piez Pastryton wasn't the target at present.

Owly shrugged the huge brown coat on somewhat awkwardly. It wasn't the best fit by any means, but it'd be fine for now, since it concealed her arms well enough. Riley took the lead, stepping inside the lighthouse, and was promptly hit by the mixed, vaguely unpleasant scent of dog and Febreze. The first floor was very bare, except someone had taped a large piece of paper to the floor and written rules on it in black sharpie. First and underlined three times was "WHAT SPOTTY SAYS GOES UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE". Right under that was "COUNTRY MUSIC IS GOD. WHY ARE YOU NOT OBEYING GOD?"

Riley had no comment. Owly minced around the paper, examining it from various angles, as they waited for the elevator to descend. Once the metal box was waiting for them, Gabriel grudgingly recalled himself to his Pokeball (apparently, he still didn't trust Owly to behave professionally around Riley. Probably with good reason) and the two humans entered in silence.

The elevator carried them to the top floor, where the battlefield sat, encased in a dome of glass and steel. A girl sat cross-legged on a battered chair at one end of the battlefield, obliviously listening to her iPod. It was her Quilava that noticed them first, and he prodded her with a stubby paw until she looked up.

"Oh, hey," the girl greeted them. "I'm Spotty. Didja come to challenge the Gateon leader? 'Cause I'm pretty sure the sign she left that said she wasn't here is still up."

"Nah, Ry just wanted to battle you," Owly told her brightly. "I'm here to referee. And hit on him, can't forget that."

Spotty nodded, completely unperturbed. "Sure, I'm bored anyways. Never agree to gymsit, like, ever, 'specially a canine gym. All ya get is drool and pennies." She waved Riley over to the other end of the gym.

"Ahem, six-on-six battle, double battle, no switching, blah blah blah, you know the deal," Owly said. "Begin!"

Riley was faster than Spotty. His Gyarados and Arcanine had already fully materialized by the time Spotty managed to send out a Growlithe and Vulpix, which were completely dwarfed by Hector and Richard's bulk. Hector threw back his blue-scaled head and bellowed a challenge, vibrations seeming to shake the foundations of the lighthouse. Richard's Intimidate was more subtle, but equally effective – the Arcanine snarled, fire bubbling from the corners of his mouth, as more fire wreathed his huge paws, giving him a demonic appearance.

"Hector, Rain Dance. Richard, Extremespeed the Vulpix," Riley ordered calmly, pulling up his hood. Owly swore and did the same.

"Abby, Crunch on the Arcanine! Tim, Grudge!" Spotty shouted.

Riley didn't bother to recant his order. It was too late for it anyway – Richard tensed, then leapt forward, one short leap, barely landing before a second, longer leap, and then morphed into a blur of orange, black, and cream that flew through the air. He slammed into the small Vulpix with brutal ferocity. Tim's eyes glowed a fierce, hellish crimson as his tiny frame was sent flying backwards. Rather than a howl of pain, an unearthly shriek that came from the Vulpix – and at the same time, was obviously _not_ of the fox – split the air. Richard, understandably, flinched back as the Vulpix crumpled to the ground, obviously defeated, but his Grudge was more than successful. Abby took the opportunity to fling herself forward and latch onto the Arcanine's creamy mane with all four paws. She opened her mouth wide, then bit down hard. Dark energy mimicked her movements, closing vicelike on Richard's shoulders, his mane protecting his throat from most damage. The Arcanine threw himself to the ground, shaking Abby off him by slamming his smaller counterpart into the battlefield.

As the Fire-types had been wrestling for power, Hector had flailed around in what was evidently a Rain Dance. It probably would have been graceful, awe-inspiring, terrifying, something of the sort, if Hector had been in the water. As it was, it merely looked somewhat odd and vaguely humorous. Still, it did what it was supposed to – clouds somehow gathered under the glass dome, drenching everyone inside it with a sudden downpour. Spotty yelped and stuffed her iPod into her pockets, recalling Tim and saving the unconscious Vulpix from a further trampling as Abby got to her paws.

"Vulpix is unable to battle," Owly announced, as if it wasn't completely obvious to everyone, not to mention late.

"Hector, Dragon Dance. Richard, attack with Thunder Fang," Riley said, not bothering to wait for Spotty to send out her next Pokemon.

"Crap, Abby, Double Team and fall back! Gibbs, Scary Face and go in for a Bite!" Spotty responded, hurling her Granbull's Pokeball as if she meant to brain the Arcanine with it.

Unsurprisingly, it missed as Richard lunged forward, fangs shedding luminescent sparks. He latched onto air as Abby disappeared into a mirage of images, separating to become a pack of identical Growlithe. They scattered and Richard whirled around, attempting to keep all the Growlithes in his line of sight. It didn't work, as they made sure to circle him, constantly moving and snarling. Richard did get an eyeful of the Granbull emerging from its Pokeball, however, teeth bared and eyes glinting with unnatural gold light.

Richard froze momentarily. It might have been longer, but then Hector's victorious bellow broke in, his Dragon Dance completed. Richard reacted instinctively, leaping to the side (and falling through one of Abby's shadow-images as he did so), though Gibbs managed to latch onto his hind legs with his forepaws and sink his jaws into the Arcanine's ankle. "Hector, Waterfall the Growlithe. Richard, use Odor Sleuth and Return," Riley said.

"Gibbs, get offa that Arcanine and Thunder Fang the Gyarados! Abby, keep your distance and use Helping Hand," Spotty countered quickly.

The multiple Growlithes all began to howl, glowing with orange-yellow light, which separated into multiple marble-sized globes that shot towards their teammate, sinking into the Granbull's purple fur. Hector surged forward and up, water gathering around him as he did. Gibbs released Richard's leg and ran forward on all fours, jaws sparking with electricity. The Granbull plunged headfirst into the swirling water surrounding Hector, electricity spreading into the water. Hector roared in a mixture of pain and frustration, and the water dropped abruptly, leaving the Granbull and Gyarados to drop back to the battlefield. While the Thunder Fang was not as effective as it would have been had Gibbs managed to make contact, Hector was still a Water/Flying-type.

Meanwhile, Richard closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, sorting out the various scents over the still-pouring rain. He found the one he was looking for and, eyes still shut, barreled forward, glowing with multicolored light that blended into a white tail, giving him the illusion of a rainbow comet. Richard slammed into the correct Growlithe clone with shocking speed and strength, sending Abby flying. The Growlithe hit the ground hard, skidding slightly to a stop by Spotty's feet.

"And now the Growlithe can't fight," Owly said, examining her fingernails, utterly bored by now. She'd seen more than enough of Riley's fights.

Spotty recalled Abby, thoroughly nervous by now. "Tony, you're up," she called out, opening the Vaporeon's Pokeball. "Water Pulse at the Arcanine. Gibbs, keep up those Thunder Fangs!"

"Thunder Fang, Richard," Riley responded. "Hector, Aqua Tail."

The Vaporeon touched down gracefully, paws barely making a splash in the accumulating rainwater. Tony opened his mouth as if to roar, but a Water Pulse spiraled out instead, speeding towards Richard, who circled constantly to the right and towards the Vaporeon. Despite Tony's best efforts, Richard dodged the brunt of the attack, and got in close enough to clamp his teeth on the Vaporeon's shoulder and send electricity racing through its veins.

Meanwhile, Gibbs attempted to perform a similar maneuver on Hector, which was foiled by the Gyarados bringing his tail down on the Granbull's head, slamming him with the equivalent of fifty high-pressure hoses. This was more than enough for Gibbs to faint, and probably give him a concussion. Nothing a few minutes in the Pokemon healing machine wouldn't fix, but he wouldn't be battling soon.

"Do I need to bother?" Owly grumbled.

Again, Spotty recalled her Pokemon, and hesitated over her remaining two Pokeballs. Quickly, she glanced back at her Quilava. "Ham, you're up! Swift, concentrate on the Gyarados! Tony, Hyper Beam the Arcanine!"

"Waterfall the Quilava, and continue with your Thunder Fang," Riley said.

Richard sunk another Thunder Fang into the Vaporeon's skin, but Tony had just enough time to twist and fire an impossibly bright, golden beam of energy point-blank. Both Pokemon collapsed, neither able to continue trying to rip the other's throat out.

Meanwhile, Ham kept his distance, instead firing off a stream of star-shaped rays that hurtled towards Hector with impossible speed. Hector surged forward, surrounded with his wall of water, smashing into the Swift and destroying them with his velocity and sheer bulk. The Waterfall came down upon the Quilava like a ton of bricks, burying him in a deluge of water.

"Oh, hey, she finally killed your Arcanine," Owly noted, as the trainers recalled their fainted Pokemon. Riley didn't bother to answer, eyes focused on Spotty, hand hovering over Gabriel's Pokeball.

Spotty bit her lip, hesitating. She had only one Pokemon left, and she wasn't a fan of the idea of fighting with him, ever. But her pride wouldn't allow her to give up without a fight, no matter how much she was being stomped at the moment. Making up her mind, she grabbed her last Pokeball and tossed it out onto the field. At the same moment, Riley hurled Gabriel's Pokeball, and the two Pokemon materialized in a burst of white light.

Entei blinked away the rain, swiveling his head back to glance at Spotty, who only nodded. Riley shoved his hands into his hoodie pockets, trusting Gabriel and Hector to the rest.

The last battle began without an order from the trainers. Instead, Gabriel launched forward, elbow blades shrieking through the air with the light of psychic energy. He swiped at the Entei once, twice, and used the Entei's own body to vault backwards, narrowly avoiding the hazy violet counterblast, which was easily recognizable as an Extrasensory. Hector roared, vibrations shaking the foundations of the lighthouse, and blindingly white light gathered in his open mouth, materializing into a Hyper Beam that tore through the rain-soaked air and slammed into the Entei with the force of a meteorite, sending the legendary backwards with the force of the blow.

The stunned Entei did not have enough time or energy to react when Gabriel sprinted back into range, blades glowing with blue-white energy of a False Swipe. He brought first his right blade, then his left up into the Entei's chin. It wasn't hard to imagine cartoon ducks swirling around the legendary's head from the sheer force of the blow. Gabriel grabbed the canine by the jaw, forcing it to stare into his own crimson eyes, which glowed with the silver-white light of Hypnosis, sending the Entei into uneasy slumber.

Several things happened at once. Before Spotty could react, Owly tore open her coat, shoving it back from the Snag Machine that whirred with sinister red light on her left shoulder. Quickly, she threw the Ultra-turned-Snag Ball, which arced through the air to its target, striking the Entei on its gold and crimson mask. A shrieking, air-tearing noise accompanied the Entei's transformation into energy and absorption into the Snag Ball.

At the same time, Gabriel dashed forward, disappeared into the gold light of a Teleport, and reappeared directly in front of Spotty, eyes glowing once more with his Hypnosis. Caught completely off-guard, Spotty also fell unconscious, slumping forward. Gabriel caught the human girl as the rain lifted, and the murky water began to recede from the lighthouse battlefield.

"We won," Owly announced smugly, stepping forward to scoop up the Entei's Pokeball.

* * *

"What is that thing anyway?" Raea asked, obviously torn between laughter and derision.

"Mine," Psycho responded gleefully, adjusting her iPod headphones. The two smallest cars on Pyrite's drift racing "track" were idling side by side, surrounded by a mixed cast of Pokemon who kept others at a respectful (and/or suspicious) distance. One was the black, gold, and hot pink car that had rocketed into recent fame as Stalkeraea's. The other was a bright orange monstrosity with a demonical grin in blue-white branded into its hood. Not surprisingly, that one was Psycho's.

"Who'd you steal it from?"

"I'm shocked you would ever think that I could steal anything," Psycho said primly. "Besides, it was Achuza who did all the heavy lifting, isn't that right?" In answer, the headlights and the Rotomcar's face blinked off and on again quickly. "So there," Psycho concluded, as if that proved anything.

Raea rolled her eyes and didn't reply, instead turning up the volume on the car stereo to levels that made Horace, preemptively buckled into the passenger seat, wince. Psycho responded in kind, which earned the two of them plenty of dirty looks as alt rock and J-pop blasted away in cheerfully discordant melodies. Soon enough, the traditional telepathic announcement signaled the beginning of the race.

**ATTENTION, RACERS. THE RACE WILL BEGIN IN T-MINUS TWO MINUTES. WILL ALL BYSTANDERS PLEASE REMOVE THEMSELVES AND THEIR POKEMON FROM THE VICINITY.**

Raea briefly wished that the rest of the Orre leaders had actually bothered to come, but she couldn't really fault them for not ditching the task of trying to figure out where Moon had gone. Still, she couldn't exactly explain to them that that was exactly what she'd come to do (well, that _and_ pound Acacia Sakaki into the mud), just in an increasingly roundabout way that happened to provide her with amusement and had little to no chance of actually working.

Suited Raea just fine though.

**RACERS, ON YOUR MARK.**

Hastily, Raea brushed dark hair back from her shoulder. Last thing she needed was to get her vision obscured by her decidedly eccentric fashion sense. Horace began his meditation breaths – count of seven, inhale, count of seven, exhale, rinse and repeat.

**READY.**

Psycho uncrossed her legs, running a brief check on which pedal was supposed to tell Achuza what to do. Speed up, slow down, brain someone with a Shadow Ball or something similar, turn was already covered by the steering wheel… Should be enough. And if it wasn't, that was where Psycho's kickass improv skills came in, although she did wish she'd brought more than one gun. Probably would have lost them anyway.

**SET.**

Farther down, an armored car roared to life, blinding unfortunate onlookers with the intensity of two blinking strobe lights substituted for its headlights. Acacia Sakaki was fond of intimidation and psychological tactics, among other things, rather than direct combat. Still, the Tyranitar and Parasect waiting for license to decimate their surrounding foes certainly didn't speak badly of her combat capabilities. Not for nothing was she Pyrite's Colosseum leader.

**GO.**

The skeletons of metal and various carbon-based materials leapt into motion, some more gracefully than others. Multicolored shields sprung up around cars, some more effective than others. Raea noted Solaria tearing into a pair of Smeargle, while Tira parried the machete of a particularly murderous-looking Medicham, in her peripheral vision. Probably Psycho's Pokemon were having the time of their life, but Raea wasn't interested in them at the moment. She wrenched her car into a hard right, cutting unceremoniously across the trajectories of other racers, the combined forces of Horace, Argyris, and Wicked fending off attacks as she did. Her car – or, to be more accurate, Horace's Protect shield – smashed into the armored side of Acacia's, not doing much to damage the car, but doing plenty to get her attention. The Octillery suctioned onto the roof attempted to drive back the smaller car with a Bullet Seed, but Argyris tore through each separate projectile with his lightning-quick reflexes and double-fisted Ice Punch, boosted by the Weavile's Ice-typing.

"Damn it, Psycho, hurry the hell up!" Raea shouted over the sounds of Wicked destroying a rain of Icicle Spears headed straight for her car.

"Stuff it," Psycho grumbled, and the sudden illumination of a Hyper Beam lit up the race track, followed by the eerie shriek of a volley of Shadow Balls and the scream of a blade-winged Skarmory descending on convenient prey. The cars peeled off one by one from Raea as their attention was taken by the newcomer.

"Thanks," Raea told her, before cutting that connection and establishing a new one. "Hello, you crazy bitch."

"Oh, figures, a fucking brat like you _would_," Acacia Sakaki's voice grumbled. "Ice Beam on the road, would ya?"

"Wicked, intercept it," Raea rapped out quickly. As the Octillery swerved its head forward, artillery morphing from seeds to condensed winter, the Gengar matched it, switching places with her teammate as she unleashed a pulsating Dark Pulse that smashed into the Ice Beam, throwing up particles of ice and darkness that were torn away by the rush of passing wind and drifted harmlessly to the asphalt behind them.

"Oh, for the love of God, stop trying to avoid it!" The redhead dragged on the wheel, forcing her car into a sharp turn, shoving against Raea's much smaller and more fragile one. "I'll run you off sooner or later," Acacia reminded her mercilessly.

"I'd like to see you try, you old hag," Raea said cheerfully. "Horace, gimme a hand here."

A sudden burst of Psychic energy combined with the frictionless surface of a Reflect forced the two cars to careen wildly to the side, into a sudden narrow path that was split from the main road by layers of stratified rock. Raea grinned – there was no fence on this road, Acacia was between her and the fall, and she knew there was a decent-sized, artificial lake (that probably smelled and tasted like crap) waiting.

"Oh, you _bitch_!"

"Aw, you flatter me," Raea mocked, hoping Gimble would take the cue. She wrenched her car closer to the canyon wall, at the same moment as the violent appearance of a Persian on the hood of her car. Argyris lunged without being told, swiping down crosswise with both hands, tearing an absolute void in the night with his Night Slash. The blows caught the Persian on the back of its neck, but Argyris's specialty wasn't attack. With a yowl, the Persian swiped with one paw, Secret Power manifesting in brown light that tore loose overhanging rocks. Argyris leapt onto one, pushing off it to gain more height, then spun and dove down towards the Persian, fist pulled back and gathering icy energy.

"Damnit, Argy, watch the rocks!" Raea shouted as Horace's Protect sprung up once again, deflecting the falling boulders from the metal of the car. Acacia's derisive laugh was irritatingly clear over the radiophone.

While Argyris and the Persian were battling, Wicked managed to leap the short distance from the hood of Raea's car to Acacia's, electricity sparkling in her claws. Before the Octillery could react, she plunged a purple paw into a rubbery tentacle, channeling her Thunderbolt through its own body. The Octillery's tentacles lashed out, somehow managing to spout Psybeams like demented rainbow extensions. The abundance of shadows they provided allowed Wicked to dodge them by slipping into the dark world populated by ghosts, darklings, and other denizens of the night, then slam it with an Energy Ball.

"Hey, Casey, how's it feel to have your ass handed to you by a midget?" Raea inquired gleefully. Acacia responded by attempting to ram her car into the teen's again, only to be foiled once more by Horace's Protect.

"That's not nice, is it?" Raea scolded, adrenaline making her even brattier than usual. "Your poor, poor mommy would be rolling in her grave if she saw what her children did, I bet."

"Fuck off!" Acacia snarled, unable to respond in a more violent manner.

"You first," Raea smiled viciously. Quickly, she slammed her car into Acacia's. There was, naturally, little to no damage, but that wasn't important at the moment. What _was_ important was that Gimble understood, which was evident by the car's sudden spluttering and Acacia's frenzied attempts to regain control, teetering precariously close to the edge of the mountain path.

"Get back here, Gimble, Wicked," Raea ordered. Her Pokemon needed no further urging – with a last Thunderbolt, Wicked disappeared back into the dark discs that signaled a Faint Attack, slamming into the Persian as she reappeared on the roof of Raea's car. Argyris helped, striking at its paws with an Ice Punch, and sent the startled cat flying into its ally Octillery. Gimble appeared with an eardrum-popping snap and a few wisps of dark energy in the backseat of the car, jabbering in fragmented Sableye. Raea couldn't tell the exact words since her Psycho-provided translator was obviously bootleg and she'd ditched it, but Gimble's meaning was clear.

"You lose," Raea informed Acacia cheerfully. "Notice how all your controls have been cut?"

And with that, she slammed into the older woman's car one more time, sending it flying, flying through the air, then falling, falling into the lake, the Octillery and Persian clinging desperately to the metal frame –

And then a multitude of brown tentacles rose from the lake, cushioning the car's fall and preventing the Pyrite collosseum leader from falling into its watery depths, and the domed head of a Tentacruel broke the water's surface. Jalanili was as huge as Psycho had claimed, which was a good thing, since Raea wasn't really interested in killing her maybe-maybe-not boyfriend's aunt (there was a big difference between shoving someone off a cliff and outright killing them, she maintained firmly). Still, Raea couldn't resist a laugh before she cut the connection.

Naturally, it wasn't until long after Raea had rejoined the main track that she realized. "Oh, fuck, I forgot to ask her about Realgam and Cipher and crap," she muttered.

"… Oh well. Probably wouldn't have gotten anything out of her anyway."

* * *

After Psycho had invited herself into the Pyrite gym, sleeping bag arrangements turned from crowded to hectic. Raea had resolved this by kicking out her guests from her apartment floor and forcing them to sleep on the battlefield, and maintained they should be happy that the irritating neon strobe lights and the music were turned off and would stay that way (not that they were usually on at night – waste of energy). Naturally, there had been much whining, at which point Raea had invited them to go check in at the Super Grand Hotel if they were so unhappy with her gym. It shut up the complaints effectively.

To be completely honest, Psycho's arrival had coincided perfectly with Raea's intent to kick the other leaders off her floor anyway. Although most of the leaders had a vague idea, at absolute worst, who Alexander Sakaki was, she wasn't exactly sure how many of them knew Xander Silver.

After a quick login with an account she used only to contact the Johto boys, Raea curled up on her chair, waiting for a response. It came pretty quickly – Xander was meticulously prompt. She accepted the invitation to chat, and the webcam video materialized, taking over her laptop screen.

"Hey, Silver, got any conspiracy theories for me?" Raea greeted him, absentmindedly playing with a strand of slightly damp hair (showers. God, especially after a really irritating race).

"Does it count if Alan's convinced that the coming solar eclipse is going to be used to capture and or beat the shit out of Ho-oh?" Xander asked, obviously resisting the urge to smirk. "Good to see you too, Strae."

"What, is he still going on about Alph legends?" Raea asked skeptically. "And God, Xan, what happened to your _hair_? It's all…" she motioned vaguely, which really didn't convey anything helpful at all.

"Yeah, yeah, I missed you too," Xander smirked. "And not like you have room to talk, Miss Stalkeraea."

"Aaaaw, you don't like the faux-neon-ninja look?" Raea teased. "Don't answer that. Got anything good on Cipher?"

"I thought you might ask," Xander said. "I nosed around some. You should already know that Cipher's always had ties to the Colosseums, and if it helps any, the paper records show the Colosseum funds dipped about three months back – right around the time the Inter-Regional League declared their intent to establish a League in Orre, you know?"

"We figured but… crap. That's just annoying," Raea grumbled. "Any idea what they're paying Cipher to do?"

"Probably just the generic Shadowification, maybe some superweapons thrown into the mix, possibly both. Cipher isn't my forte."

"I know, I know, it's Rockets," Raea rolled her eyes, lacing her fingers together. "Do you have _anything_, like, say, the location of some Cipher base or other we can raid?"

Xander shrugged. "Try the old labs, I suppose. They're not very cheap to create, and I doubt Cipher would abandon them without a fight, since the League doesn't have the manpower to guard it after their initial data-swipe."

"Poor understaffed workaholics," Raea snickered. "Right, then, we'll keep that in mind. Shouldn't be too hard to find a base in the desert… tchyeah, right."

"Good luck with that," Xander told her, hovering somewhere between concern and amusement. "Though maybe you should consider getting some more allies?"

"Who would that be?" Raea asked. "None of us are native to Orre, yanno, and it's not like we have friends here."

"Convince them, then," Silver said matter-of-factly. "You hang around Duel Square, I'm sure you can find someone to bribe. Besides, Lance is still in Orre, isn't he?"

"He is?" Raea asked skeptically. "Since when?"

"I'm not sure. Two, three weeks? Somewhere around that."

"Mhm. He would be helpful, I guess, but I get the feeling he thinks we're incompetent, psychotic teenagers," Raea admitted, drumming her fingers in a staccato rhythm on her knee. "Besides, I don't think he gets much respect from the other Orre leaders. Cape syndrome and all that, yanno?"

"Is that it?" Xander asked. "Just tell them why he joined the Inter-Regional League in the first place, ten years ago. They'll get respect for him in spades."

* * *

Pyrite really, really sucked in the middle of the night. Not because of the frequent muggings, not because of the disturbingly high rate of trainers and random bystanders checked into hospitals for Pokemon-related injuries, not because of the violence in general. No, it really sucked because the city wouldn't _shut up_, which was mostly why Narre, ever sensitive to light and sound, elected to spend her insomniac hours unraveling the encrypting on the Inter-Regional League files.

The brunette finally finished sometime around three, or maybe five. It didn't really matter, except she'd probably need a lot of caffeine or a long nap the next day, but that could wait. Lance's file was surprisingly short – Narre had expected a lot more carefully documented blackmail. Shrugging, she selected the oldest file.

_October XX, 1999._

_Tags: the Lugia incident, Lance, Pendragon, Cerise Island, the Blackthorn clan, the Viridan natives_

The Orre Colosseum always held the matches in the middle of the night, never beginning until after the sun had set. Urban legend claimed it was because back in the days before air conditioning, absolutely no one _wanted_ to run around expending energy during the scorching desert day, though apparently the freezing night wasn't as much of an issue. Lance had always figured that the Collosseum leader was just nocturnal or something of the sort, maybe some subset of vampire wannabe.

Earl Lugosi certainly seemed to like vampires. While he didn't wear the traditional cape, he wore a long black trench coat that billowed dramatically in the breeze of the open colosseum, and he was tall, gaunt, and pale enough to fit the stereotypical image of a vampire. The older man attempted to stare down Lance from across the arena. Lance ignored the blatant hostility, sliding his hands into the pockets of his dark jeans in indifference.

_LANCE PENDRAGON has over the course of the last six months attempted to capture and wield the death dragon Lugia to destroy the human population._

Earl broke the silence first, brushing aside the flaps of his trench coat and unclipping a Pokeball from his belt. "I'll admit, I didn't expect you to make it this far so quickly, but then, you are the child prodigy," he said dryly. "Shall we begin?"

In response, Lance produced his own Pokeball, maximizing it without a word. Two Pokemon materialized in twin eye-searingly bright bursts of light.

_He has admitted to complete knowledge and willful execution of this act. His allies, if any, are unknown. His motivations are similarly unknown._

"Alais, Stone Edge," Lance ordered. His Garchomp leapt forward, becoming a blur of dark blue hide and white claws as it sped towards the Crobat. As she ran forward, the battlefield began to quiver, as various chunks of stone ripped themselves free and trailed after her, surrounding the Garchomp with a makeshift shield of desert rock.

"Vlad, Double Team," Earl countered, decidedly unimpressed. The Crobat simply stared at the oncoming Garchomp, mirror images of itself peeling away from its skin two at a time, quickly accelerating and forming a shifting ring around Alais. She appeared unconcerned, slamming her right claw into the ground and sending the rocks orbiting her shooting out towards the clones. Most missed the rapidly shifting circle of clones, but some did tear through a couple, and a large one smashed into what was apparently the real Crobat, if the sudden disappearance of the others was anything to go by.

_A descendant of the Blackthorn clan, this situation is volatile. It seems clear a large part of his success was due to knowledge handed down from the Blackthorn clan, although rumors also circulate that he has abilities from his mother's side, a descendant of the ancient people of the Viridian Forest, which may also have contributed._

"Follow it up with Dragon Claw," Lance said.

"Substitute, Vlad!" Earl responded quickly, noting the obviously worn state of his Crobat from the super-effective attack.

The Crobat reacted first, wrapping all four of its wings around its elliptical body and disappearing into a puff of smoke, replaced by a stuffed and stitched silk replica that dropped the few feet between it and the ground with a dull thump. Seconds later, Alais tore through it with one claw blazing with the blue of draconic fire, sending shreds of stuffing everywhere. As the plushie fell apart, Vlad was unceremonially yanked back into the real world from whatever dimension he had disappeared into, except now several meters in the air, comfortably out of Alais's reach.

"Vlad, Air Slash," Earl ordered.

"Draco Meteor."

_The reaction of the Blackthorn clan is unknown._

At the sound of the legendary attack's name, silence seemed to descend on the stadium for a brief second, before the crowd erupted into frenzied chatter. The two battling Pokemon ignored them all, concentrating on their various attacks. Vlad attacked almost incessantly with Air Slash, sending rush after rush of deadly wind after his earthbound foe. Alais dodged each with grace and a possibly unnecessary flourish, turning each movement into another step in a mocking dance. She sped up her movements, eyes taking on a blue glow, before throwing her head back and roaring a challenge to the Crobat.

The sky answered. Suddenly, a ball of blue fire fell from the night sky, then a second, a third, until the sky seemed to be blazing with light. The Crobat never had a chance and fell to earth, crushed by the weight of the draconic meteorite. Others smashed into the hastily raised Protect fields that encompassed the entire audience, as well as the two trainers (an added safety measure after Shadow Pokemon had first been created nine years ago), causing the ground to tremble from the force of the impact. Once the sand and dust kicked up had settled back down, it was obvious to all onlookers that Lance had won.

_EDIT: The Blackthorn clan has taken this incident out of the jurisdiction of the Inter-Regional League._

Alais stepped back, slipping into a neutral position. Lance toyed slightly with the fanged necklace he wore, exposed by his black beater. "Well?" he asked quietly, voice carrying over the suddenly hushed arena.

_EDIT 2: The Blackthorn clan arranged for Lance Pendragon to be afforded amnesty if the Inter-Regional League takes him as one of their own, with, presumably, added conditions between the boy and the clan. _

It wasn't exactly unknown that while Alais was an exceptionally strong member of Lance's team, the Garchomp wasn't Lance's main battler. Neither was it unclear that Earl's main Pokemon and powerhouse was Vlad, who had been taken down much quicker than anyone had expected, and Alais was much less wounded than anyone would have guessed.

_The League accepted this, as, destructive tendencies aside, the boy is obviously quite gifted._

_Try me_, the sky emperor invited. _Threaten me and mine again, I dare you, and I will destroy you and all that you stand for, Earl Lugosi._

_The League will monitor this situation carefully, and will do whatever is necessary to guarantee the safety of the regions._

* * *

A/N: … SHUDDUP, I CAN FANGIRL ANNOYINGLY OVER LANCE AND MAKE HIM BADASS IF I WANT. D: RIGHT? … RIGHT?


	7. World on Fire

Pyrite was as quiet as it ever got at three in the morning. Most of the lights had been extinguished, except for the faint neon store signs and the rare, unbroken streetlight, which cast dim shadows that gave the town a sense of eerie serenity. None of this bothered Narre Nyaonoko, who stepped into the city soundlessly despite the predawn chill that permeated the air.

The brunette nudged the gym door shut with her foot, not bothering to lock it. She brushed back her hair and took a deep breath of city air. Smog-choked as it was, it felt good after a day spent at her laptop. She walked away from the gym, heading in the direction of the canyon that separated Pyrite from its Colosseum. As she did, she reached for Adenaryuu's Pokeball, rolling it around in her palm a few times before she pressed the catch and the Dragonair materialized in a flash of light.

The huge serpent blinked sleepily, eyes reflecting the dim city lights as blurrily as the crystal orbs at her neck and tail did. "_What is it now_?"

"Everyone's being a bitch," Narre answered simply. "Give me a ride to the Under, would you?"

Adenaryuu didn't bother to ask her trainer what she was doing, but instead dipped her head slightly, allowing the teenager to scramble onto what was probably her shoulderblades. The Dragonair ascended gently at first, then leapt into the air, gaining speed with no apparent effort on her part. Neither noticed as Astraea Athanasia stepped away from the gym window, letting the curtain fall back into place.

The two reached the canyon quickly, and Adenaryuu floated for a brief second, eyeing the fissure in the earth with a mixture of suspicion and interest. Then she surrendered to gravity, plunging into the earth like an arrow. Narre whooped, clinging to the Dragonair for all she was worth. All too soon, the earth suddenly reappeared, and Adenaryuu pulled up, veering sharply to avoid slamming into it.

"God, we have to do that some more," Narre panted, grinning wildly despite her efforts to seem casual.

Adenaryuu laughed lightly, floating gently along a couple of feet above the concrete of the Under, but did not answer beyond that. The two continued on in comfortable silence, the orbs at Adenaryuu's neck and tail giving off a soft, bluish-white light that scattered shadows around them.

And then the shadows rose and tried to swallow them whole.

Tendrils of darkness lashed out, slicing impossibly into Adenaryuu's scales as they tightened and pulled, stretching the Dragonair with manic speed. The Dragonair screamed in fury, light blazing from her eyes and mouth, coalescing into a Hyper Beam that swept through the shadows. There was no obvious effect but the shadows multiplying, and the Imprison showed no signs of stopping, relentlessly tugging the captive dragon in multiple directions.

Narre leapt off Adenaryuu, reaching for her Pokeballs as she did. She landed hard, nearly twisting an ankle, and quickly regained her balance. Before she could do anything else, a Gengar materialized out of thin air, grinning demonically. Its eyes glowed a pulsing, hypnotic silver, and Narre felt herself collapsing to the ground like a puppet whose strings had been cut.

Adenaryuu saw her trainer fall in her peripheral vision, which prompted her into new levels of fury. Draconic flames blazed into life, rippling across her scales with an insane speed that matched the frenetic pace of her heart rate. Before she could launch the Outrage, the Gengar whirled, dark energy gathering in its right paw. The mass flew forward with unbelievable speed, shrieking through the air with a sound disturbingly like a tortured scream. The Sucker Punch slammed into Adenaryuu's head, disorienting the Dragonair enough for the Outrage to flicker briefly. At the same time, an icy gale outlined by the tiny frost crystals it carried rushed Adenaryuu, hitting her with more strength than an Icy Wind should have. The Dragonair crumpled to the concrete, shadows unraveling from her body and returning to their natural state.

"And this is why you're supposed to be careful at night," a girl's voice drawled. Its owner stepped out of the shadows, gloved arms folded across the overly ruffled top of her lolita-style dress. She smiled brightly at the unconscious bodies of the S.S. Libra's leader and her Dragonair, smugness radiating from her. The Gengar melted into the shadows and reappeared at her right side, and a Mismagius detached itself from the darkness to float at her left, eyes and orbs glowing with the erratically pulsing light of a Nasty Plot or two.

_I win._

* * *

_in the dawn of time, when the world was young, our king of the land regigigas was born. he was given dominion over this mortal plane to shape from it what he would. he brought forth the three regents, born of ice, rock, and steel, to serve him as his eyes and his arms. these titans were called regirock, regice, and registeel in his honor._

_when we the last children of mew were born, havoc was written in the stars. for a time, there was peace, the regents showed us how to build and create, and thus was born the age of kings. _

_as the years wore on, the uneasy peace between regigigas citybuilder and shaymin gracidea-born wore thin. with the advent of winter, once verdant orre became their battleground. one fought for the advance of civilization, the other for the beauty that was in the earth. one by one, both gods gathered to them their followers, and we were the blessed called to shaymin's side._

_when our lord and master gracidea-born triumphed over regigigas citybuilder, it was at a price. plunged into millennial slumber, it was left to us to seal away the fallen son of mew gemini, as arceus thousand-armed forbids the destruction of the gods by any hand but his own. and so we have sealed away regigigas citybuilder and his triplicate face, though we owe all to it, though we feared it._

_perhaps, in the future, there will come a time when the two may reconcile and regigigas citybuilder will once more walk the earth as they once did. but now, now is the time for both to sleep…_

* * *

"That's all you have to show for twelve boxes worth of Pocky?" Raea asked, thoroughly unimpressed.

"You still have more, stop whining," Psycho retorted from her perch on the back of the couch.

"It's not like there aren't tons of other variations on the whole 'why Regigigas got stuffed into a rock' shtick online already," Raea said.

"This one's probably right though," Piez pointed out. "What with it being straight _from_ the rock."

"Still doesn't help much," Kris said bluntly.

Psycho rolled her eyes. "I'm sorry I'm not a miracle worker," she said sarcastically. "Two hours is short notice."

"Not when you stay up until three in the morning watching J-pop videos," Kris grumbled.

"Strae, let me borrow your boots so I can give him a boot to the head," Psycho said.

Before the two could get into outright violence again, the door swung open and Angeline walked in, eyes studiously averted from the assembled trainers.

"_Miss Pastryton, there is a call for you from the Gateon gym,_" the Gardevoir said politely.

"Oh, good, I need to tell Spotty to stop listening to Imp and Tinkerbell's mad schemes," Piez said, getting to her feet.

"_That may not be possible_," Angeline said, choosing her words carefully.

"What?"

"Angie, are you…" Raea asked suspiciously.

The Gardevoir did not answer but stepped aside, allowing the Orre leaders to more or less stampede past. What appeared to be the underside of a Quilava clinging to one side of the glass greeted them. Apparently Boston had had some… issues getting the videophone to work properly, and had climbed onto the Gateon gym videophone's screen so he could actually be seen.

"Boss, why are you calling?" Piez asked, mildly perplexed. Sure, she had an idea, but…

Boston leapt down from the screen, leaving a boring view of the far wall, and spoke at the phone. For the benefit of the teens who had already ditched their Psycho-provided translators, Angie reiterated, _"Saxon is the only one with thumbs, and he didn't want to_. _By the way, I'm sorry about the phone bill, this is the… um, twelfth attempt. I think._"

"It's fine, Boss, just tell me what you need to," Piez reassured him.

"_Spotty's been kidnapped, her Entei was Snagged_," Boston summed it up.

"…"

"…"

"Well, balls," Piez responded. "Do you know who did it? And why didn't you guys _stop_ them?"

"_We don't know who they are,_" Boston admitted. "_There were two of them, probably around your age, maybe a bit older. One of them was male, dark skin, longish dark hair, and he ignored the other one a lot – female, reddish brown hair, and pretty loud. She called him Ry, and she was the one who threw the actual Snag Ball, though he beat down Spotty's Pokemon with three of his – an Arcanine, a Gyarados, and a Gallade. _

"_And as for why we didn't stop them, well, they were battling on the top floor, and only Alexander was watching them. You know Alex, he got too scared to do anything and ran for us, but by the time we got there, they were gone. Probably Teleported away with the Gallade,_" Boston explained apologetically.

"Okay Boss, thanks. If anything else happens, tell Sax I don't care how lazy he is, he's going to help you call me right away."

"_Got it._" With that, Boss scrambled back onto the screen of the video phone, hind legs frantically kicking at air as he hauled the rest of him up by his forepaws. Piez hit the power button before Boston could make himself look even sillier scrambling to disconnect and turned to look at the assembled Orre leaders.

"So, now what?"

* * *

Kris had, by this point, completely given up on trying to force the girls to stop arguing over various ways to track down and maul-and-or-kill the Cipher Snaggers, and was instead waiting for them to stop screaming bloody murder.

"Where'd Narre go anyway?" Kris asked Piez, who was not participating in that lovely conversation.

"No clue," Piez answered, obviously not happy about that. Neither of them bothered to state the obvious – Cipher had obviously been after Spotty's Entei, and the other two Johto beasts were with either Piez herself or Narre.

"Oh, that's great," Kris grumbled, getting to his feet. "Shut up already!" he added loudly, voice cutting through the girls' argument about blades versus guns. For once, they did, but not without a few grumblings from Psycho and Raea.

"Look, we're not going to get anywhere arguing over how to kill Ciphers, even if it is fun," Kris said irritably. "So, game plan. We're splitting up. One group goes to Duel Square to recruit people, maybe nag them about things some. One group goes to the Collosseum, same thing except with Acacia Sakaki added. And the last one group goes into the Under to check the old Cipher databases, see if there's anything we can use. Any objections? No? Then let's move."

* * *

"Lorelei, Mashiro, double Fire Blast!" Ri ordered, for once focusing all of her attention at one place.

"Kasar, Earthquake!" her opponent responded quickly.

The Ninetales and Flareon each spat out embers, which leapt forward and quickly assembled into the shape of twin characters. At the same time, the green dragon floating on the other end of the rough battlefield let out an ear-tearing screech, heavy tail slamming once, twice into the ground. The shockwaves passed under the Fire Blast without any change, and continued barreling on towards Ri's team, gaining momentum as they did. Lorelei leapt backwards, avoiding the first shockwave, and nearly tripped over herself avoiding the second. Mashiro was not so lucky, jumping over the first just in time to slam into the second, which greeted him with a face full of rock, grit, and debris.

The Flygon had finished its Earthquake and tried to maneuver out of the way of the two Fire Blasts. It threw itself to the side, wings buzzing madly, and barely avoided one, the heat alone leaving visible red burns on its green scales. It careened into the other head-on, screeched in pain, and was thrown to the ground by the kinetic force of the blast.

"I win," Ri announced, recalling Lorelei and Mashiro.

Her opponent, who looked like he'd gotten his clothes from various yard sales that had taken place at least twenty years ago, sighed in disappointment, recalling his Flygon as well. He crossed the makeshift battlefield in long, loping strides, despite the cracks and craters left in it from the last Earthquake.

"I never thought I'd say this to a twelve-year-old, but good match," he said, searching the pockets of his polyester pants.

"Aw, thanks," Ri grinned. "If you're looking for money, I don't need any, you can keep it."

"Oh, really? Good, that was kind of what I needed to buy lunch," he trailed off. "So, if you're not in it for the money, why've you been in Duel Square for the last couple of hours?"

"See, my friends and I are looking for strong trainers!" Ri answered cheerfully.

"Why?"

Before Ri could answer, a familiar Flareon and Glaceon pair ran between the two trainers, materializing out of seemingly nowhere. "Hey, Ri!" Starfire yelled, running after her two Pokemon, who recalled themselves rather than stick around. "Come quick, you won't believe what Bunny's doing!"

"What?" Ri blinked in confusion.

"No time for that, let's go! Sorry gotta swipe her be back later," Starfire added to the other trainer, grabbing Ri by the arm and tugging her along. Ri waved helplessly.

Starfire half-dragged Ri to the Pyrite Gym, barging in through the unlocked front doors and breezing past Angeline having tea with Narcissus, a Weavile, a Lopunny, a Mawile, an Empoleon, a Charizard, and a (pouting) Raichu. The main gym arena showed signs of recent usage, if the monstrous, melting icicles and various scorch marks were anything to go by. Oddly, someone had set up a television and connected it to some game console or other, which was blaring irritating J-pop at full blast (it was a good thing that the Inter-Regional League made soundproofing a building requirement). Bunny's plastic-winged self was playing Dance Dance Revolution against a man with a ridiculous red and white afro.

"Ooh, is that…?" Ri asked, voice barely heard over the music.

"Miror B," a boy's voice answered. Ri and Starfire had overlooked him, mainly because he was sitting right beside the door, drowning out the video game music with his iTouch.

"Who the hell are you?" Starfire asked. "And how'd you get in here?"

"Miles Brandt," he said, like it really should have been obvious. "Phenac Collosseum leader."

"Ooh, Bunny's stalkerfriend?" Ri chirped.

"…"

"…"

"What?" Ri asked, mildly put out.

"Never mind, Ri," Starfire sighed. "Why didn't she mention you when she called?" she asked Miles. _And what's a Collosseum leader doing here anyway_?

"I only just got here," Miles answered, rolling his eyes. "Are we done with the Spanish Inquisition?"

"Not really."

"So why are they playing with Raea's DDR?" Ri asked curiously. "Are they friends or something?"

"According to the Gardevoir, they had a battle, Miror B whined, and Bunny challenged him to DDR," Miles said dryly. "They should be done soon."

"Oh, good," Starfire said, toying with a lock of hair. Although she didn't say why, it was obvious to all three of them that small talk was quickly evolving into verbal barbs and awkward silence.

Bunny whooped as the song came to an end, striking a pose that looked vaguely ridiculous considering that her wings were knocked askew from all the hopping around. Miror B mimed stabbing himself and bent over too far, losing his balance and toppling to the floor.

"That was epic fail," Starfire shouted over the game-generated voice saying something generically congratulatory.

"I know, right — Miles!" Bunny vaulted over the waist-high rail that made it look like the DDR set had been stolen from an arcade, throwing herself with glee at the Phenac Collosseum leader. Miles took the overenthusiastic hug in stride, managing to return it while not being knocked back by the force of a butterfly-wearing teenager in hyper mode.

When Bunny released her captive/boyfriend, Miles produced a multicolored Gracidea bouquet with a flourish, presenting it to her and setting off another round of high-pitched squealing and hugs that nearly crushed the delicate flowers. Starfire wandered off to prod Miror B's side with the toe of her shoe. "Are you awake?" she inquired, wondering if he'd smacked his afroed head too hard on the floor.

"Piss off," came the muffled reply.

"If it makes you feel better, you're not the first meterosexual Bunny's smashed at their own game," Starfire offered.

"This game is nothing like dancing."

"Don't care. Don't think you know anything about what Cipher's doing these days?"

Miror B sat up, eyeing Starfire over the top of his ridiculously round glasses. "Why do you need to know?"

Starfire just looked at him, like it should be obvious.

The ex-Cipher adjusted his glasses. "I'll be square with you, kid. I don't give a shit what Cipher is doing. They can go fuck themselves for all I care, and as long as they stay out of my way, hey. If not, I'll just have to kick the crap out of them and maybe see what I can do for their Shadow Pokemon."

"A regular Pokemon lover, aren't you?" Starfire quipped, unprepared for the coldness and clarity she hadn't known Miror B possessed.

"I've seen the labs. Have you?" He stood up, brushing dust off his purple polyester pants. "See ya around, kid."

* * *

" – and I fucking swear if you don't let me leave right now – "

Riley tuned out his captive again, wishing they could simply Teleport into the main containment area rather than have to walk. Sure, the anti-Teleport fields made it much harder for anyone to escape, but it made it much more time consuming in general. Gabriel patiently half-guided, half-dragged the Gateon girl forward, who continued into the fifteenth minute of her swear-laden, rather repetitive rant without missing a beat.

Then they turned a corner and came face to face with a messily drawn Mightyena on the wall.

Gabriel examined the Mightyena with interest, although Spotty seemed much less impressed. Riley glanced down the hall to see Moonish J sitting on the floor, facing the closed door to her room, armed with three sharpies – blue, green, and black. She was, unsurprisingly, drawing on the door, obviously pretending not to have heard the three come around the corner. That, or she honestly hadn't heard Spotty's complaints, which Riley doubted.

"_Why are you drawing on the walls?_" Gabriel asked with a mixture of curiosity, exasperation, and resignation.

Moon glanced up then groaned. "Oh, god, Spotty, please don't tell me you brought your iPod."

"Moon! Everyone's freaking out, you shoulda seen Daisy, I heard she almost bitchslapped that Realgam Collo guy – " Spotty began, and Moon turned to glare at Riley, obviously blaming him for bringing the younger girl into the general vicinity. Riley returned her stare blankly while Spotty chattered on.

"Spotty, shut up. What's-your-face, go figure out where the tea is, will you?" Moon asked Gabriel, grabbing Spotty by the wrist and towing her through the door, ignoring the unfinished outline of what was probably a Luxray.

Gabriel glanced at Riley, obviously wondering if they should even bother take what was probably an invitation to a tea party. Riley shrugged and stepped in after the two girls – they had time to waste, since it'd take Owly a while to report into their boss and get back. Gabriel rolled his eyes and followed his trainer in, ducking slightly to avoid smacking his head on the doorframe.

"_Why should we bother to have tea with them?_" Gabriel asked, crossing the room to the equivalent of a kitchen. He began rifling through shelves at random, while Spotty and Moon argued over why Spotty could or couldn't hook up her iPod to the speakers ("Because you'll melt the speakers with crappiness!"). Riley didn't answer, but he didn't need to.

* * *

If you'd asked Piez Pastryton what she thought of double battles, the Gateon girl would have pointed out if she'd hated them, she wouldn't be in Orre, now would she? Double battles were _fun_ – more ways to fight, more ways to play, more ways to beat down people she didn't like.

Just, well, not double battling with another trainer.

"Kris, if your Magnezone's fat ass gets into Jericho's way again, I'm giving him full license to smash him across the arena," Piez muttered as the referee shouted the obvious conclusion to the collosseum.

"Like he has any attacks that'd bother Polaris anyway," Kris responded, recalling his Magnezone. "Are you sure you're using him next battle?"

"Nope," Piez said, following suit and interrupting Jer's interested sniffing of the unconscious Nidoking. As their opponents vacated the arena, Piez reclipped Jericho's Pokeball to her belt, unhooking Molly's as she did. She tossed the minimized Pokeball from one hand to another with nervous energy as the two Orre leaders waited for their next opponent.

Acacia Sakaki was apparently popular in Pyrite, if the sudden roar of the crowd was anything to go by. The redhead's stride was saturated with grace, power, and confidence, which was both incredibly annoying and impressive at the same time, which Piez hadn't been completely convinced was possible. She took her place at the opposite end of the arena, completely at home in her own Collosseum.

"Ready?" she asked, in the sudden hush. She cut off the referee before he could begin, just a quick glance. "You know the rules by now."

The four Pokemon burst out onto the arena in a blaze of light. Molly leapt out onto the field first, letting out a sharp bark of excitement. She was met by an answering snarl from Acacia's own Houndoom, a male with a scarred face and nicked horns. Cepheus eyed Acacia's Octillery belligerently, which was a rather impressive feat for a Kingdra.

"Molly, Sunny Day!" Piez ordered quickly. "Follow it up with Solarbeam at the Octillery."

"Damnit, Piez, stop screwing up my plan – hit that Houndoom with a Dragon Pulse," Kris added to his Kingdra.

"Dark Pulse on the Kingdra, Rock Blast that Houndoom," Acacia responded almost lazily over Kris's command.

Molly howled, a sound that conjured up images of black hellfire and the screams of those unlucky to die, roasted alive. The open-air Collosseum grew all the brighter, which was promptly underscored by the other Houndoom spitting out a stream of sable midnight, starkly black against the intensified sun. Cepheus met it with a blue-green stream of draconic energy, and dark and dragon slammed into each other with a dull noise like an imploding planet. Most of that was drowned out by the Octillery's tentacles tearing cobblestones from the arena ground, slingshotting them at Molly, who countered with a rushed Solarbeam, obliterating the old rock in flashes of gold-orange light.

"Caspian, Ice Beam! Bryant, Solarbeam this time," Acacia ordered.

"Nasty Plot and Sludge Bomb," Piez said.

"Fine, Rain Dance and Hydro Pump," Kris snapped irritably. Cue the audience's shouts of disapproval and scrambling to find a makeshift shelter.

The Octillery's eyes glowed pale blue, and a cone of cold wind and almost blindingly bright ray shot from the beaklike structure that passed for its mouth. The Ice Beam collided with the Solarbeam, and winter and summer collided with a flash of blinding light, multiplied and scattered by the sudden rain. It was probably the Rain Dance that stripped the Solarbeam of its raw power. Whatever the case, both beams cancelled out, and Acacia's Houndoom's Solarbeam also rapidly decreased in power, enough so that Cepheus's Hydro Pump slammed it into the side of the Collosseum with the force of a thousand sledgehammers, except with a side effect of drowning.

While all this miniaturized weather that would have made a meteorologist tear out his hair took place, Molly's eyes were taking on a sinister, silver-white glow, the corners of her muzzle appearing to curl up in an impish smirk. Nasty Plot done, the Houndoom made a retching movement and appeared to vomit up purple sludge, which gained a mind of its own and slithered jerkily between the cobblestones, advancing on the Octillery, bubbling and gurgling with the rain.

"That is bloody disgusting," Acacia muttered. "Caspian, Surf and drown them both," she added, recalling her battered Houndoom. While recalling Pokemon and waiting to send out another to avoid attacks was frowned on, Piez got the distinct impression no one in the Pyrite Collosseum gave a crap.

Unfortunately, this left Piez in the nasty predicament of having a giant wall of Rain-Dance-powered water blast at her Houndoom. Well, two could play at that game, she decided, quickly recalling Molly as Kris whooped, obviously plotting chaos with the now-soaked field, as the barriers separating the arena from the audience glowed dingy green, keeping the majority of the Surf contained in a four-foot high bowl. Cepheus plunged beneath the surface of the water without being ordered, though Kris did shout a command to Dragon Dance after his Kingdra. Acacia's Octillery also submerged, disappearing between the murky waves.

Piez rolled her eyes and went for the obvious choice. The flash of light from Biscuit's Ultra Ball was blinding, and the Suicune stepped down gracefully to stand on the surface of the water, tiny waves sloshing at his paws. The appearance of the legendary dog was met with dull surprise, as Acacia's Arbok slithered into the depths of the water without a splash. Piez bit back the urge to order an Ice Beam and have flash-frozen Octillery and Arbok, and opted for slightly less damage. "Biscuit, Whirlpool!"

"Cepheus, Outrage," Kris added, grinning gleefully.

"Crowley, Toxic! Caspian, break the shield," Acacia ordered in response.

Biscuit threw back his head and howled, a deep, mournful howl that really shouldn't have been as effective as it was. The waters swirled, faster and faster, until a vortex yawed at the center of the battlefield. Blue-gold draconic fires lit up the water, illuminating the shapes of the Kingdra, Octillery, and Arbok still submerged in the water, drawn crazily in rapid circles around the whirlpool. Purple ooze seeped into the water, snuffing out the colors of the Outrage as the Arbok's potent poison pervaded the pool, the water itself becoming Toxic. This did not appear to affect the Octillery, suctioned onto the green barrier and smashing its rock-hard head into it. Somehow, it shattered, giving the same effect as a Brick Break, and the water drained away, leaving the now-poisoned Kingdra limp and an irritated Suicune standing on the slick cobblestones.

Acacia and Kris recalled their Pokemon (well, Acacia recalled her Arbok, at any rate), though Acacia looked irritatingly pleased with herself while Kris was not happy at all. Before either could send out another Pokemon, Piez ordered quickly, "Ominous Wind!"

Biscuit languidly raised his head, glaring at the Octillery through half-lidded crimson eyes. An unnatural wind drifted around him, roaring quicker and exploding outward in a swirl of dark purple spiritual debris. The Octillery latched instinctively onto the cobblestones, which saved it from being thrown back but not from the purple detritus digging into whatever sore spots it had acquired.

"Why are you doing better than him?" Acacia asked pleasantly, unhurriedly selecting her next Pokemon. She tossed the Ultra Ball from one hand to another, obviously stalling for one reason or another.

"Why do you give a damn?" Piez inquired.

Before Acacia could answer, Kris opened his sole Pokeball, ordering at the same time, "Thunderbolt!" Even before the white light completely faded, an eye-searing bolt of electricity soared through the rain, sinking into and targeting rather vital nerves beneath the Octillery's rubbery skin. The Latias threw back her head and sang out, a sound that was part battle cry, part triumph.

"Ice Beam," Acacia ordered flippantly, tossing her Ultra Ball onto the field at the same time. "Stone Edge, keep that Suicune busy."

"Surf, Biscuit!" Piez ordered quickly.

The Octillery's eyes snapped open, obviously unhappy. Even before Acacia completed her order, its head rotated nearly one-hundred eighty degrees, firing an Ice Beam at the opposing Latias at the same time. Eltanin squeaked in fright and shot upwards, but the Octillery kept pace, smashing through the particles of Sandstorm summoned in its teammate's wake. Said Tyranitar was busy pelting giant chunks of rock at Biscuit, who responded in classic legendary style – that was, trying to drown him.

Eltanin screamed as the ice coated her wings, dragging the Latias back to earth. Kris swore violently enough to prompt the audience to laugh, which didn't help any. "Kris, if you let her piss you off, I'm calling you a pansy for as long as you live," Piez hissed.

Kris's answer was a simple, concise "Draco Meteor."

Eltanin lifted her head, cooing a harsh, angry note. One by one, blue-black rocks whistled from the sky, spinning on some deranged axis as they smashed into the combatants. One glanced off Biscuit's crystalline, hastily erected Mirror Coat, changing course and hurling itself at the Tyranitar's armored chest with a vengeance. Not that it did much good, though the Octillery certainly wouldn't be getting up again.

Piez assessed the situation rapidly. She had two Pokemon mostly well and one Pokemon left to choose from. Kris, on the other hand, had a Toxic-inflicted Kingdra and a very weakened Latias, and one more Pokemon to choose. Not good, considering Acacia Sakaki still had a bloody Tyranitar that had survived a legendary's Draco Meteor and four more Pokemon in good condition. She hadn't expected Acacia to do this well.

"… Balls. Kris, you better help me kick her ass, or God help me, I'm kicking yours."

* * *

Owly approached the doors of the fourth and youngest Cipher admin, Entei's Pokeball held firmly in her right hand. The automatic doors slid open soundlessly, and the Cipher Snagger advanced, doing her best to seem casual.

It wasn't the first time she had met her boss, or been in his office, so she knew what to expect. A sparsely "decorated" room greeted her, if an abused desk, a swivel chair, and a battered couch shoved against the wall could be considered decoration. Loki Vulcan, only a few years older than Owly was, looked completely bored manning a desk, what with his feet propped up on it while he fiddled with a match or three.

"Morning, Loki," Owly greeted him warily.

Loki didn't look up from his miniature fires. "I assume you're Miss Strigiforme."

"Loki, you've met me before, why do you need to _assume_?"

"Spare me the banter and tell me why you're here."

In answer, Owly placed the Snag Ball that held Entei on the knife-scarred desk and stepped back. Loki blew out his matches and picked it up, passing it through the infrared rays of the scanner he wore clipped to one fingerless glove. A 3D holographic image of an Entei sprung up, rotating in the air above the scanner.

"How nice." Loki placed the Pokeball back on the desk. "Another Snagger claims to be in possession of Raikou at the moment, and heaven help her if she manages to lose it between now and the time the squad gets to the Under."

"You're chatty today," Owly noted blithely. "We that much closer to conquering the world?"

"Closer than your father ever got," Loki said bluntly, opening a new pack of matches. He lit a new one, examining it critically, as if there was something to examine. He might as well have written "GET OUT" on Owly's forehead in bright red Sharpie, and his meaning wouldn't have been more clear. Rather than making one of her usual smartass comments, Owly decided to hightail it out of his office. No sense hanging around with an anarchist arsonist any longer than she had to, superior or not.

* * *

"This is the most retarded errand ever."

"That's the fifth time you said that," Raea grumbled, awkwardly perched on Arsenic's back. She understood why Psycho preferred rides on her Flygon to her Skarmory – it was just not comfortable or particularly easy on the nerves sitting on the rounded surface that made up a Skarmory's back.

"And it's still true," Psycho retorted, as Arsenic touched down in the sheer darkness of the Under. The two girls scrambled off, and Arsenic recalled himself, the flash of light transmuted into darkness by the seals they had mooched off of Bunny. Coordinators might be prissy, but they did have their uses.

"So where to?" Raea asked, voice pitched so as not to carry into the darkness of the Under. Rather than answer verbally, Psycho glanced around and started off in what was probably the vague direction of the abandoned Cipher base. Raea pulled up her hood and followed.

They continued on in relative silence, which was unsurprising given the nature of the Under. To the untrained eye, this stretch of the Under looked just like any other, but Psycho knew better.

"The lights are on, so who's home?" she breathed, grinning wickedly.

Raea eyed the other girl suspiciously. "Please tell me we're not beating up some poor hobo."

"Maybe we will, maybe we won't," Psycho said flippantly. "Really, who cares?"

"I bet the hobo does," Raea grumbled. "Let's just leave it alone."

"Fuck that, the Under is mine, and I'm gonna see who's in it," Psycho responded, pulling out one of her multiple handguns appearing from seemingly nowhere. Raea sighed and produced her metal yo-yo from her pockets, swinging it carelessly at her side.

"We need to find you a better outlet for stress," she muttered, following the masked girl to the faint light.

The source of the sickly greenish light was a Spiritomb, whose purplish-green flame was swaying that somehow managed to convey boredom. The woman-girl, maybe in her early twenties, sitting beside it appeared to have sunk into comic book radiation, white hair and grayscale lolidress turned an almost nauseatingly green shade. Not that this bothered her, if her intent examination of an Ultra Ball in her hands was any indication.

Out of curiosity, Raea squinted at the Ultra Ball, trying to make out whatever was contained under the glassy black-and-gold surface. Psycho saw it first, though.

"That's _Auslaufen_," she hissed, grabbing Raea's wrist to make her point. Before the other girl could respond, Psycho released her grip, aimed, and shot in one smooth motion, emptying the magazine of her gun all at once.

Unluckily for Psycho, a green Protect barrier flickered into place, and the bullets sizzled and dissolved on contact. Almost at the same time, pigtails tightened her grip on Auslaufen's Ultra Ball, running to put the Spiritomb between herself and Psycho. An Absol leapt from the darkness, only to have its wickedly sharp scythe parried by Lunaria, Psycho's Marowak. More battles erupted into existence, as the white-haired girl's and Psycho's Pokemon attempted to tear at each other's throats.

Raea took in the situation quickly, automatically releasing several of her Pokemon at the same time. The Absol was locked in battle with Lunaria and Alcaeus, Psycho's Heracross, and holding its own, which didn't bode well. Gimble joined in, screeching like the insane ghost-cat-thing she was, which didn't help the escalation confusion. A Honchkrow dove from the cavernous roof, slicing at Arsenic and Lee-lee, Raea's own insane Butterfree, who might have been doing more harm than help. At the same time, a Mismagius melted out of the floor, throwing Shadow Balls left and right. Psycho and AK-47 were busy trying to reduce the Spiritomb to a pile of dust, but it was holding them both off while pigtails fiddled with a PDA at top speed.

Split second decisions were not Raea's specialty. "Come on, Twilo," she told her Roserade, breaking into a run. He followed, deflecting stray attacks with a wave of Magical Leaves. The Pyrite girl leapt past the distracted Spiritomb, yo-yo whirling through the air in a wide, accelerating arc that terminated at pigtails's head.

Except then it was slapped aside by a Gengar that materialized out of nowhere, batting aside the heavy metal like a toy. At the same time, pigtails finished whatever she was doing with the PDA and grinned.

"Too late, midgets," she informed them gleefully, and the ground began to rumble. Raea scrambled backwards as Twilo intercepted the Gengar, meeting its Shadow Ball with his own. Not that it did much good, as the Gengar's Shadow Ball tore through Twilo's and slammed into the Roserade, throwing him high and back. Lights flared on in the distance, approaching quickly – some kind of transportation, Raea was sure. Pigtails had backup.

"Psycho, we need to haul ass, now!" Raea shouted, throwing herself to one side and barely dodging the Gengar's Shadow Claw. At the same time, she released another Pokemon, Solaria, who charged the Gengar, dark energy of a Crunch gathering at her fangs.

"Fuck that!" Psycho shouted back, changing her aim from the Spiritomb to the Gengar. Three bullets smashed into the Gengar's purplish body, only for the holes to close over, as if it hadn't been injured in the first place. It probably hadn't.

"… Okay, fine! Arsenic, get your feathered butt over here," Psycho ordered. The Skarmory dove at the Mismagius, forcing it to dodge out of the way, flashing towards its master in a blur of dull metal. Psycho leapt on easily, somehow, recalling Lunaria and Alcaeus, AK-47 keeping pace and hurling attacks at anyone who got too close. Raea turned to run after them, diverting her attention away from the Gengar. That was a mistake.

Quick as thought, the Gengar slipped past Solaria, phantom energy already manifesting around its forepaw. The Shadow Claw hit its target – Raea, puncturing her shoulder. Solaria tore into its body, putting herself between her trainer and the Gengar, but the damage had already been done.

"Fuck," Raea gasped, as AK-47 hoisted her by the armpits, swinging her up onto Arsenic's back the way a three-year-old would have been helped onto a merry-go-round. "You owe me," she informed Psycho through gritted teeth, pressing a hand to her left shoulder. "God, that stings. And I think I'm bleeding."

"You'll live," Psycho said shortly, as Arsenic ascended, Lee-lee flying around them in a spiral, throwing out attacks to prevent the arriving Pokemon from striking them down. "But what was that bitch doing with Auslaufen, and where'd Narre go?"

No answer, unsurprisingly.

* * *

A/N: HEY LOOK I'M NOT DEAD YET.

… At least let me finish writing my will before you all skewer me. Also, this is the last of the chapters I already had finished. Have fun waiting until like June for another one.


	8. The Devil to Pay

Dusk fell on Realgam Tower, and the sterile, gleaming white spire burned a hole into the dust-streaked sky. Anywhere else, to anyone else, it would have been a pretty, even beautiful sight. Ray Ellington thought it could have been improved with a few blasts fueled by nitroglycerin or trinitrotoluene. Just a spark here or there. But he was biased when it came to beauty, the sharply unorganic lines that marked something as manmade, the unnatural proximity of perfection.

He kicked open the stainless steel door that opened into the tiny observation deck at the very pinnacle of Realgam Tower. The air was thin and cold, especially now that the sun was going. It was a tiny space, really, maybe ten feet in diameter and with a rickety, waist-high plastic railing. Most sane people would never have stepped out of the door.

Well. No one had ever accused him of being sane before.

Nothing ever came to this point ninety-nine floors above the ground. From here, he could see in all directions. Desert, desert, desert. A small, blurred dot that was Phenac was visible somewhere to his right, just another spot on the bleached-bone-sand that was quickly darkening with the sunset. Already it was dark for him, but there would still be light on the ground below. The leader of Realgam's Colosseum tucked his hands inside the pockets of his jacket and waited, despite the darkness, despite the cold, despite the wind, despite the deafening silence.

Idly, he wondered if it had ever snowed in Orre.

Drowned out by the roaring winds, the humming noise could have been mistaken for nothing but the rush of blood through human veins, if it wasn't for the fact that it was escalating to a shriek. He glanced down thousands of feet, wondering what had happened to that assault of vertigo he'd been so used to. Probably the same thing that had happened to the burst of dull surprise that one usually felt open being face-to-face with a figure out of legends. Even if it was a mostly dead, midgety flying hedgehog-turned-poodle like Shaymin.

The almost-ghost was gruesome, and he'd always assumed that it looked the way it had at death. Must not have been a peaceful one, if the multiple burns and charred flesh were any indication. The skin, fur, and most of the flesh on the right side of its face was peeled or peeling away, bubbling out faintly at the edges, where dead tissue tried desperately to cling to the underlying bone. It gave him a good view of the blacked, twisted roots of the still-intact gracidea that clung to the Shaymin's exposed skull. The pink flower practically radiated vitality, despite its decaying host, despite being about as real as the mutilated monstrosities from Ray's nightmares.

So maybe a little real.

"Fluffy," Ray greeted the spirit. "Are you done dying yet?"

Fluffy threw back its head and cackled, a soundless thing that left the impression of scraping fingernails in the minds of whoever was in proximity. Well, just Ray, anyway. While the projection of its body spasmed – probably in some kind of coughing fit that was pointless because its lungs no longer worked and wouldn't have been able to anyway, considering he could see where the Shaymin's muscles fluttered in tattered ribbons above the left side of its ribcage – Fluffy's voice rebounded inside his head.

_OH yes YES almost aren't you GLAD to be RID OF ME?_

"You can say that again," Ray muttered under his breath. He could have shouted it for all the effect it had on the phantom, whose head merely lolled to one side in its spasm of amusement.

_thank you THANK YOU so much for coming to SEE ME when no one else did thank yooooou_

"You've only been giving me nightmares every time I tried not to after the first time I came here," Ray told it. He watched with a sort of morbid fascination as Fluffy's unnaturally tongue lolled out from the side of its mouth.

_yes yes this SHOULD BE the last time isn't that lovely_?

"That's great, Fluffy."

how long has it been THREE YEARS three years oh how time flies –

"Fluffy, I really gotta go now."

_no no stay STAY WITH ME_

"Uh, Fluffy, I really don't want to spend any more time with the not-quite ghost of the Shaymin Cipher dicked around with. Not that you're not great company." Lies.

And then rather than words, his mind was barraged with the not-quite sonic equivalent of an atomic bomb. He dropped to his knees, eyes squeezed shut against the mental cacophony that was three years' worth of a slow death by chemical burns, decaying flesh, and asphyxiation condensed into a few heartbeats' worth of agony. It was the death scream that had choked the Shaymin, and it wasn't exactly pleasant.

They really shouldn't have bothered to put such a small platform at the height of Realgam Tower. It was like whoever had built it had wanted to fulfill some perverse desire of betting on how long it would take the first poor sap to fall off it.

Well, whoever had bet on ten years won the pot.

(_this isn't the fall that kills you you have yet to reach bottom you can't even imagine it the way you are_)

* * *

Raea studiously examined the ceiling while Angie carefully cut away various entangled and bloody threads from her shoulder. Eleven sat at her other side, holding her right hand with both of his, eyes closed. Pain Split was a delicate technique to use on a human, but Eleven appeared to be doing a good job of it, considering that he or his trainer wasn't spontaneously opening cuts or scabbing over with greenish flakes of dead skin.

Psycho stepped into the room, back from raiding the Pyrite Gym's collection of instant noodles. She hooked her foot around a chair leg and pulled it out, setting down her giant plastic bowl of boiling water and dried ramen before taking a seat across from an uncomfortable-looking Miles and Bunny. Smiling brightly, she stabbed her chopsticks into the bowl with the same amount of force one would use when trying to put out someone's eye.

"Hello, Brandt," Psycho greeted the Phenac Colosseum leader cheerfully. "I'm Psycho Fel, and you're gonna tell me what the Colosseums are doing being all buddy-buddy with the Ciphers to try to get up the League's collective ass." She stirred around her noodles in the uneasy silence, humming the Mission Impossible theme.

"Come on, Psycho, Miles already told us what he knows," Bunny defended her boyfriend.

"Which was about jack shit," Psycho said bluntly.

"I'm sorry I don't lower myself to associating with Cipher as much as you seem to want to," Miles said coldly, attempting to stare Psycho down. It got nowhere, considering the girl was too absorbed with prodding the mass of softening noodles into something edible to notice.

"Look, Miles, are you sure you're not leaving something out?" Starfire asked him, biting off the head of a green and yellow gummy worm. "'Cause like. It sounds like you're leaving out details. Or something, yanno?"

"… No."

"Then for starters, why are the Collosseum leaders so pissed at us?" Psycho asked innocently. "Did we murder their pet Eevee or something?"

"Nah, Earl and Acacia are just anal when it comes to their territory," Bunny said cheerfully. "And, um… uh, actually, I dunno about the others."

"Brandon is quite happy so long as he has a can of beer in one hand," Miles said succinctly. "Preferably both. And as for Mr. Ellington, well, he mainly keeps to himself."

Psycho rolled her eyes. "How very helpful. Let's just cut to the chase and you can tell us which legendary Cipher wants to turn into the equivalent of a nuke and where they're gonna set it. Or are you too ashamed that your prissy rich family is the one that's paying for the destruction and death of a bitchload of people?"

Silence. Psycho's bluff had hit home.

"Damn, I'm good," she muttered, idly twirling a noodle around her chopsticks.

"Miles?" Bunny touched his arm gently. "Miles, look at me."

"You might as well tell us," Starfire recommended. "I mean, the whole thing's stunk of Cipher from the start, and it's not like they really do any new tricks, ever."

"Miles, I'mma point out the obvious here. If you're so guilt-tripped about maybe killing people, _tell us and we can kill Ciphers instead_," Psycho said.

Cue staring.

She threw her hands up in exasperation. "Fine, we won't kill anyone! Happy?"

"Please, Miles?" Bunny coaxed. "We only need what-slash-how and where. It's not too much, is it?"

"… Regigigas."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Well, that makes sense," Psycho said brightly. "They must've figured out the Regis were hanging out in Orre way before we did, and wherever the Regis are, Regigigas has to be somewhere too."

"Where, though?" Starfire asked. "Mt. Battle, maybe?"

"No. Pyrite."

"Aw, fuck," Raea threw in from her corner.

"Shuddup and let Angie poke your stab some more," Psycho told her. Raea responded very maturely by sticking out her tongue. "But seriously, why Pyrite? Did Acacia piss off the Ciphers somehow? 'Cause I can so see that happening."

"It's not like that," Miles said reluctantly. Probably figuring it couldn't get much worse, the Phenac Colosseum leader explained, "They've decided it wouldn't be worth it to try to capture Regigigas directly – "

"And it breaks their tradition of Shadowfying a trio of legendaries!" Ri chipped in, the first contribution she'd made in half an hour.

" – and have, instead, deigned to capture the lesser golems and force them to undergo Shadowfication."

"What does that have to do with making Regigigas rampage around Pyrite?" Starfire wondered.

"I'm getting to that. Once the Shadow golems are released in Regigigas's vicinity, Cipher is ninety percent sure that the synchronization they seem to have will cause Regigigas to rampage as well, which will cause incredible collateral damage to the surrounding area. In this case, it's the Under Colosseum."

"I _knew_ I should've gone and checked that out some more," Psycho complained.

"So, let's go capture Regigigas right now and stop them," Bunny suggested cheerfully.

"Not going to work," Miles said. "Cipher has anticipated something might happen and stationed several squads in the Under. I'm sure you've noticed them."

"Ooh, that reminds me, would you happen to know this white-haired bitch with pigtails and a grayscale outfit?" Psycho asked.

"… what."

"Just answer the question. I think she's a Snagger too," Psycho said.

"It sounds like Cecilia Avignon. Her main Pokemon are a Gengar and Mismagius, usually her Absol too. She's near insane and violent," Miles said. "I wouldn't advise getting near her.

"That's okay, Psycho _is_ insane and violent," Bunny reassured him.

"_And_ now I have at least three motivations to smash her skull in," Psycho announced.

"Psycho, I'm gonna say it for everyone else," Raea informed her. "Shut up."

Psycho slurped up her ramen. "Oh, fine. Also, I'm gonna go run around, see if I can convince any of the hobos in the Under to cause some chaos. Don't wait up."

* * *

"Kris?"

"_What._"

"That was fun. But mostly fail."

"We still won, didn't we?"

Piez resisted the urge to roll her eyes. "Sure, if you count Siegfried chasing around that Persian for five minutes before actually hitting it as a win."

"Embarrassing, but a win," Kris sighed. He brushed imaginary lint off the sleeve of his blue-and-white hoodie, idly wishing he'd bothered to take his car. Raea had insisted that Pyrite's daytime traffic and lack of actual parking made it more trouble than it was worth, but the gym was a long way off from the Colosseum when people were following and gawking the whole way.

After a few more moments, Piez whirled around and _glared_, a very respectable evil eye that would have sent many small children and some adults running for the hills. "If you're going to be paparazzi creepers, hang around so I can punch you so hard your face turns into a vagina," she snapped. This drew some stares but mostly caused averted eyes.

"How very subtle," Kris said, pulling his Latios hood up.

"Incredibly," Piez agreed, turning around again. "We should take bets on how many people think we're dating."

"… Ew."

Piez punched him lightly in the shoulder. "I'm _so_ flattered, Kris," she teased him. "But that's what you get for being the token guy."

"It could be worse. Maybe."

"Keep telling yourself that, Kris. It's funny when you try to delude yourself."

"Words cannot express the gratitude I feel to know that my pain amuses you – ow!"

Piez watched as Kris whirled around, rubbing the back of his head indignantly. She kicked aside the rock that had just bounced off his skull as he found his rather unimaginative tormenter.

Said unimaginative tormenter was crouched on a doorstep, an unopened can of ginger ale clutched in his left hand, wiping off stray bits of sand from his right hand on his pants. The obviously well-kept military jacket he wore was offset by scattered bits of stubble and a grubby bandage that might have once been white wrapped around his left hand, damp from the condensation that formed on the ginger ale. Piez could see this because he waved at them, just in case they hadn't figured out he wanted their attention yet.

"Kris. Do you normally attract hobos?" Piez asked, genuinely curious. Kris flushed fire engine red for some bizarre reason.

"I'm not a hobo, I'm a drunken kleptomaniac," Mr. Hobo protested.

"Hobo," Piez insisted.

"Actually, I think that's Brandon Oosthek," Kris told her. "Yanno, the Mt. Battle leader."

"… I imagined him less hobo-ish."

Before Brandon could reply, the door behind him swung open, smacking him upside the head with its screened, metallic edge of doorness (Piez decided he was lucky he hadn't been hit by the handle). "Oh, sorry dearie," the woman who'd just opened it said, gazing down a scant few inches at the sitting Colosseum leader, who had opted to rub his head in agonized irritation. "You know, you really oughtn't be throwing rocks at people from my doorstep. And why haven't you drunk any of your ginger ale?"

Brandon cringed away, and Kris and Piez stared. This was mostly because the woman looked absolutely batty. A crooked, powder blue hat was precariously perched atop a mane of frizzy, graying ginger hair, and a pair of tiny horn-rimmed glasses sat at an opposite angle on a nose which looked like it had met a couple of hard objects and lost. Also, her dress had an unfortunate paisley print in pale purple and pastel orange. She glanced up. "Well? What are you staring at?"

Piez squashed the instinct to respond, "Your face."

"Sorry, ma'am, it's just that he threw a rock at me and then you came out and gave him karmic retribution in the form of a screen door," Kris explained. So what if his explanation was slightly saner than what Piez had in mind.

"Oh, if _that's_ all… say, aren't you two the to-be gym leaders?"

"Yeah, I'm Kris Malo, Agate, and this is… uh, Piez Pastryton, Gateon Port," Kris introduced them, obviously not too thrilled with having to tell a complete stranger Piez's name. Well, at least he hadn't had Psycho with him.

"Good to meet you," Piez said politely.

"Oh, that's _right_, I haven't told you my name yet!" the woman tutted. "I'm Madame Fateen, and this sad excuse for a young man – "

"Hey!" Brandon interjected indignantly. Fateen ignored him.

" – is Brandon, my grand-nephew. Heaven knows what my niece did to him at an early age."

"Fed him beer," Piez offered, completely forgetting to be polite.

"Very likely," Fateen agreed amiably. "Why did you throw a rock at… Mr. Malo, was it?" she asked Brandon.

"I wanted to ask him for directions," he said plaintively. Kris stared some more.

"Why didn't you ask me?"

"You were cooking."

"And you couldn't ask him in a civilized way because?"

"I would have had to get up."

"Dear, your laziness never ceases to amuse me. Apologize to them and move over so I can invite them in for tea."

"Oh, no, it's okay ma'am, we have to get back to the gym," Kris said.

"I insist," Fateen smiled, which managed to appear both matronly and threatening at the same time. Brandon wasted no time in getting up and ducking past his great-aunt. Piez's stomach grumbled loudly in assent.

"What?" she asked. "I didn't have lunch."

"You had two burgers and a side of fries," Kris reminded her.

"… I didn't have lunch," Piez repeated, rolling her eyes. "They weren't _Alfredsized_."

"…"

"…"

"Well, I guess we'd be glad to stay for tea," Kris told Fateen. _I mean you're probably not a pedophilic rapist and even if you are, we have two teams of Pokemon ready._

"Lovely, dears!" Fateen ushered them both in. "Now, I have a pot of tea fresh from Almia that's almost done brewing…"

* * *

On her way through the Under, Psycho had been quite wary. She'd taken a circuitous route just to check up on the various hobos she'd befriended. They were all gone, though Psycho couldn't see or smell any traces of blood or other violence. Neither could she see any of the Ciphers, at least on this side. Either they were keeping strictly to the general area she and Raea had found them in, including the Colosseum, or they were _good_.

With a sigh, Psycho kicked aside the roof trapdoor that led into her territory, quickly descending down the rusty ladder that connected it to the catwalks. The conspicuously red PC stood at the base of the stairs hugging the wall, so Psycho ran down those two at a time, heedless of the utter lack of handrails. She'd just made it to solid ground when a voice rang out.

"Psycho, what is it I've been hearing about you?"

Psycho stiffened and swore under her breath, pivoting quickly to face a girl picking her way through the not exactly spotless floor of the Under's gym. She was almost identical to Psycho herself – short and skinny, with long black hair that did nothing to give her the impression of height – admittedly with very different clothes and a lack of white bangs. She carried a two-toned blue umbrella with an unusual metallic sheen and almost spearlike point at the center. A Gardevoir walked beside her, twin spheres of blue fire orbiting her stately and casting a multitude of shifting shadows along with the ghostly light.

"Fuck," Psycho muttered one last time, before pivoting to face the girl, hands placed firmly on her hips in an attempt to seem intimidating. "What do _you_ want, Ex?" she asked, somewhat more harshly than she had intended.

The other girl tilted her head, giving Psycho an irritatingly childish look. "I hear you've been up to a lot of things," Ex replied, meeting Psycho's furious gaze unflinchingly. "Not the least of them involving _my_ reputation."

"I'm sorry if your idea of a good time doesn't involve violence," Psycho quipped. "Can it, Ex."

"I don't think I will," Ex said sweetly, and the Gardevoir's Will-O-Wisps burst into twin, roaring fireballs bigger than her head. "I'm taking back my seat, Psycho, and you're not going to stop me. Are you."

It wasn't a question, and Psycho knew it. She leapt backwards as the Gardevoir's eyes glowed blue. The Gardevoir – Lily, if Psycho remembered correctly – flung up her hands with sudden violence, and the twin Will-O-Wisps rocketed forward, smashing one after another into the spot where Psycho had been standing only milliseconds before. Lily made another motion, but Psycho had already begun running. Still, it had its intended effect – the Pokeballs Psycho had fixed to her belt all clattered to the floor, their occupants remaining stubbornly locked in their crystalline spheres. It was not surprising, considering all of Psycho's Pokemon were borrowed from Ex.

All but one, anyway.

As Psycho ducked under the particularly rusted overhang that passed for the gym door, she wrenched a battered Pokeball from her necklace, pressing the catch with panic and force. The red aura burst out, forming into the shape of a raptor with outspread wings. The girl swung her arms around her first and only Pokemon's neck, vaulting onto the Staraptor's back. Bravestar sped up, powerful wings pushing back the air for purchase in the Under's stale air.

"Fuck her too," Psycho muttered, trying to catch her breath without tearing out some of Bravestar's neck feathers.

Psycho never looked back; that was why she didn't notice Ex flipping a lazy salute after her.

Cipher was always one for dramatics, which was probably why Cecilia Avignon was walking on a wide balcony suspended fifty feet above the floor. The balcony was not so much a catwalk as it was a random room that happened to be missing a good portion of wall. For some reason, whoever had built it had no qualms with placing what was probably millions of dollars worth of expensive, fragile equipment on it. Apparently falling was a non-issue. Cecilia hoped so, considering the three, huge domes on the ground level that enclosed what had once been the three titans of legend.

Well, that was what Cipher was for – godslaying.

Cecilia smoothed down an imaginary wrinkle in her overly ruffled skirt, humming a quick snatch of J-pop as she skipped across the balcony. She ignored the few odd looks she got from the Cipher minions stationed at the desks, though most were smart enough to ignore the Snagger's idiosyncrasies. Childish or not, Cecilia got things done.

Their leader glanced up from her laptop – the only one in a room of desktops, for some odd reason. Katerina Milan was relatively new to Cipher, and she wasn't even one of the best when it came to Shadowfication, but Greevil had placed her in command of the research wing anyway. "Hello, Cecilia," she greeted the Snagger dryly. "Would you mind dropping the levels of saccharin before you give the research team diabetes?"

Cecilia giggled. "Maaaaaaaybe," she grinned, sweeping out a mocking curtsy for good measure. "Karador told me I should give you this," she added, producing a Pokeball from her voluminous sleeve. She tossed it underhand to Katerina, who caught it easily.

"Is this…?"

Giggle again.

Katerina passed it under her laptop's webcam, and the screen changed to the black and neon green, blueprint-esque layout it used to scan the contents of Pokeballs. A malformed, tigrine face and Pokemon appeared in a painstakingly reconstructed 3D model, right down to the exact angle of the last ominously jagged stripe – Raikou, but not Raikou as the legends would have it.

"I had wondered when it would find its way back to us," Katerina murmured.

"You weren't even here when Cipher had it first," Cecilia pointed out, allowing her tones to drift into a slight whine.

"Neither were you," Katerina said, though without malice. "Thank you, Cecilia." She eyed the other woman thoughtfully. "Would you like a change in station? Security in the Under must be… disappointing, and with the Shadow King nearing completion, I might be able to arrange something with Karador."

"Really? I thought he hated you and Loki," Cecilia told her. "'Cause like, yanno, he's been generally pissy since Ardos died and Eldes went and disappeared. Ooh and Lovrina, I think he had a crush on her. Or Ardos, I can't remember," she pouted.

"Details," Katerina said dismissively, placing the Shadow Raikou's Pokeball carefully beside her laptop. "Thank you, Cecilia, but I ought to be getting back to work. Biology never _was_ a forte of mine."

Cecilia shrugged. "Okay then, bye Kat! Have fun with your perversions of nature!" she chirped, spinning on one foot and prancing off.

Katerina shook her head. "I will never understand that child," she told no one in particular.

* * *

"Se-ven bottles of beer on the waaaaaaaall, se-ven bottles of beer – !"

Ex looked up from her PDA, pausing her very intense game of tetris to stare at the house whose occupants were currently singing at the top of their lungs. Well, singing was charitable, really. Two of the voices, a young man and an old woman's, she didn't recognize, but Ex was pretty sure she knew the third.

_What the hell is Piez doing in there_? Ex wondered. She glanced at the Gardevoir in the driver's seat of the battered car. "Lily, could you pull over here for a minute?" They did, and Ex got out, ignoring the odd looks from people who recognized the deranged orange face of the Rotomcar, which was glowing in the dusty Pyrite night. There wasn't a doorbell, so she opened the screen door and knocked on the purple, besequined door. The singing did not stop, but after a minute, a rather weary-looking Kris answered, clutching a pink and white teacup.

"Psycho?" he asked increduously. "What the hell happened to your clothes? Or the mask?"

Ex glanced down at her outfit. Seemed perfectly fine to her. "Uh, nothing? Could you get Piez out here? We should be getting back to the gym."

Kris looked at her oddly. Probably Psycho had traumatized him. He shrugged and walked back inside, interrupting the trio midway through their fourth bottle. Or ninety-sixth, something like that. When they were back, Kris was carrying a bowl stuffed with cookies and Piez waved behind them at whoever was in the house, cheerfully promising to come back whenever the world wasn't ending. Ex shook her head.

"Come on, Lily's driving," Ex told them, leading the way to her car. Lily hastily shoved her newspaper under her seat and unlocked the doors. Ex reclaimed shotgun before Piez or Kris could protest, though neither of them looked quite comfortable stepping into a bright orange car that sounded like it was laughing maniacally under its nonexistent breath. By the time they buckled the (fraying) seat belts, Lily had kicked Achuza into moving again, coming painfully close to scraping paint off other cars. Ex made a mental note to scream at Psycho the next time she saw her for being a safety hazard in general.

Once they were all "safely" back at the Pyrite Gym, the three trainers scrambled out of the car, and Ex recalled Lily and Achuza. Humming cheerfully, she slipped inside the gym door, not bothering to knock. Piez ran past, having grabbed the tin of cookies from Kris, and raced up the stairs to the leader's flat two steps at a time. "We're back and we have cookies!" Cue loudly indignant reactions as other leaders protested _they_ didn't get cookies while they were out _working_ thankyouverymuch. Kris rolled his eyes and started up the stairs after the Gateon leader, so Ex followed him.

By the time the two had arrived, Starfire and Ri were nowhere to be found, and neither were Piez's cookies. She didn't _look_ like she'd been mugged, and was instead talking with Raea about something annoying Acacia Sakaki had done.

"Did we miss anything?" Ex asked curiously.

"Hello to you too, Ex," Raea said brightly.

"Ex? What happened to Psycho?" Bunny asked.

"Are you complaining?" Kris muttered.

Raea ignored Kris, explaining, "Okay so yanno Psycho, she and Ex share an identity, so yeah. She's not dead or anything, right?"

Ex shook her head.

"So, no problem. Knowing Psycho, she probably just got bored and ran off to recruit people to ambush Ciphers on her own."

"… Right."

Raea smiled cheerfully. "So, Ex, got any news for us?"

Ex shrugged, taking a seat in a fluorescent beanbag. "Um. I heard Ray Ellington fell off Realgam Tower a few hours ago."

"… Damn, we should watch the news more," Raea whistled.

"Did he die?" Piez asked.

"Nah, apparently he did some crazy shit involving latching onto the tower as he fell and somehow not breaking a hole in anything, even himself," Ex said. "And then he got his Salamence to fly him down the rest of the way. I think they've sent footage to Mythbusters or something."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Anyway."

"So, I have a stupid question," Bunny began. "Why'd he fall off anyway?"

"No one's exactly sure, except probably him," Ex shrugged. "When the paparazzi tried to jump him, he just swatted them off and his Gengar laughed like a deranged hamster and cackled something about demented legendaries haunting him until some reporter accidentally brained him – the Gengar I mean – with a microphone." Ex stopped to inhale.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kris asked.

"Cipher?" Raea suggested cheerfully.

"Realgam Tower was built by Ciphers," Piez agreed. "But what's your point?"

"A very reliable source told me that there _was_ a lab under Realgam Tower," Ex said. "They used to do experiments there and no one would hear them over the colosseum. I think they were using it three years ago until the Inter-Regional League kicked them out again. The Gengar was probably referring to one of their experiments who stuck around all cockroachish."

"… Let's pretend that made sense."

"_Oh_, speaking of psychotic legendaries, guess what Miles told us," Bunny said.

"Miles? Brandt?" Kris asked.

"Yuuuuup. Bunny's boyfriend stalkee," Raea explained. "And my employer."

"… I thought that was Lance."

"Miles pays me to kick people in the nads. Or, yanno, will," Raea smiled deviously.

"_So anyway_," Bunny interrupted, "Turns out Regigigas is holed up in the Under with Cipher guarding it until they can make it go on a rampage, and we've been arguing over what to do about it. Raea wants something with explosives, and Starfire and Ri want to catch it."

"Why can't we do both?" Ex asked.

"We will, probably," Bunny assured her. "But for the moment, we gotta figure out what to do with the Ciphers. We were thinking of calling in the League and making them beat 'em up for us, yanno?"

"So there you go," Kris said. "Let's go email Lance or something. Or, well, you can, I think he still hates me."

"Okay, I can call him or something tomorrow and see how many trainers we can get," Raea shrugged. "We should probably go stock up on potions or something if we're gonna storm the Under. And Kevlar. Kevlar would be nice."

"I could probably get some," Ex offered. "And guns. Psycho left a lot of them in the Under."

"So, there we go," Raea said cheerfully. "Shopping spree and Cipher attack. Sounds like a plan. Oh, and someone buy explosives while we're at it. I think it's time we blew shit up."


End file.
